Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Day By Day Come What May



So do not worry about tomorrow; 
for tomorrow will care for itself. 
Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:34

A couple night’s ago I had a case of insomnia.  I felt so overwhelmed by motherhood.  You know how your head can hit the pillow and you can allow yourself to start thinking about all have to do?  I can do this easily when I think of all the duties, obligations and energy I need to store up and fulfill all year long in one lump sum.  I know by now that thinking of a year’s worth of anything, especially parenting, will give me a massive case of anxiety and worry and insecurities and helplessness.  If I worry about the future, (and boy can there be a lot of worry about the future, as you see the “future” with teenagers being years away, not a decade or more that seemed forever when they were little toddlers) I lose confidence in myself.  Of course, there is nothing wrong with future plans, or goals or dreams, or thoughts.  But when those little things all become ONE giant looming mountain of “Make sure you, You have to, What if, When are we, Will he be able to, Will she remember,” my role seems daunting at best, impossible at worst.

When I take this important job I have day by day, sometimes week by week, I feel a sense of peace and purpose and joy in what I do and the anxiety is chased away.  There is nothing wrong with planning for the future, but when I think of decades, when I dream up all the what if's, it doesn't get me anything but a bucket of worry.



21 comments :

  1. I just wrote a similar insomniac post. Hope you get some sleep - I'm headed to bed to try again!

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  2. That is so true. The future, with children in mind, can be overwhelming. But we only have today. That's it.

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  3. I heard a great quote by a very good man recently to a teenaged boy. He said it is good to know where you want to be in x number of years, but right now, your focus should be on being a student, being the best student you possibly can. Then, and only then, he told him, other opportunities will open up and send you in the direction you want to go. I loved that and when applied to my life helps me focus on being the best mom I can right now, just right now. I can do that! Very similar to the Matthew scripture you quoted. I love your posts--always hit home with me.

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  4. I know this feeling all too well. Im not really sure when it started, as I dont fancy myself as someone who is easily stressed. Im a caterer, wedding cake maker, full time mum and now head up the events and hospitality in our new church building in London, and somewhere along the line all the worries about everything, all of the to do lists for today, tomorrow and 2020 came flooding in! Ive been up till 3am three nights out of 7. My brain racing and mind ticking over. When I start to pray about the things to lay them to rest I start to hear His voice, enjoy the time with Him. While its great, it doenst get me sleep! So, last night, I just asked Him to show me. WHY wont I stop thinking, why wont my mind rest. He showed me that in the business of my day and the constant focus on my boys, my responsibilities, my dreams, my hopes, my fears, that I forget about ME. Me and Him. Him and I. I pray for my kids, my hubby, our plans our fears, but I dont stop to feel. So now, when I cant sleep, I think about ME - about how much I actually DO feel tired. About how my body ACHES, about how soft the duvet is. About how much I would feel like lying here if it were wake up time! And that If I dont leave His business to Him, and let him take care of everything, there wont be anything left of me. So Im trying to be open handed with our life. Live my day today. Make lists for tomorrow and trust that the piece of paper will still be there in the morning. Sorry for the long rant but boy - this is where Ive been at! xxx

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  5. One of my absolute favorite Bible verses! I can be a worry wart myself and I just have to let it all go- sometimes it can take me days to do so, but I end up letting myself -LET GO. Take a breath, take a bath, take your iPod and let your worries go down the drain. ;-) You are wonderful and I'm sure your mother nothing less!

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  6. Ah yes, the worry! I do think it is worse in January when we are bundled up, somewhat isolated from others, and low light. Remembering that this is a tough time of year for us Midwesterners, is important. It will get better as the days get longer. Do try to get outside every day for fresh air~it will help a bit. Love this passage from Matthew.

    Years ago I took a Dale Carnegie class on "How to Stop Worrying & Start Living" and it did help. Will see if I can find the book & pass along a few tidbits. (Course Dale wasn't a mother!)

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  7. Those "what ifs" are definitely sleep stealers. Those are good words to live by, but hard to live by.

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  8. Proverbs 3:5-6 is my favorite scripture. "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding.
    In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths."
    I have considered this scripture often, putting different emphasis on different words - which changes and deepens the meaning behind the words. Especially the two "all" words - which call for more commitment and acceptance of His dealings with me!
    All mothers have worry times - but what we do during the day is much more important. Each morning, pray that God will guide you to do the most important things that day. He knows what is best, after all.
    Sometimes the day will be filled with just small stuff, and at bedtime prayer I realize that small stuff is what life is made the most of.

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  9. What a great reminder. I'm not a mom yet, but I share your struggle. Aren't the words of Christ such a comfort? Thank you for sharing!

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  10. a bucket of worry....I like that. It reminds me of my mom who says "that and a quarter will buy you a Coke". Well it used to anyway. Thanks for the sweet post.

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  11. Sarah, I think just knowing that I'm not the only one who feels overwhelmed is reassuring. I love that bible verse. Thanks for sharing.

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  12. Yep- At this age, I have finally learned to live in the day...not project into the future nor dwell in the past...just to live in the day. It makes my life much less stressful. Hugs-Diana

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  13. How fitting this was to me today as I woke this morning at 4:30 am unable to go back to sleep because I had had a bad dream and lie worrying about my 7 year old son and how will he grow up safe and kind etc... I have 3 children, 7,5 and 4 and I so worry about the future and my role as a mother. Thank you for the post. I have printed it and will put it where I can see it everyday.

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  14. It's so true Sarah, thinking about life one day at a time is all that we are equipped to handle. I get carried away with fear and worry all the time thinking about going back to work in June when my mat leave is up. I did the same thing last time with my first baby and things turned out just fine. Now I find myself getting crazy wondering how my preschooler will handle Junior Kindergarten in September - how will I pack enough for him to eat, what if he isn't fully toilet trained by then and on and on. I love the scripture you quoted here. I can only imagine how nuts I'll be when my kids are teens like some of yours are!

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  15. You know the saying "crazy people don't know they're crazy."
    I think mothers who don't worry about their kids SHOULD worry about their kids.
    The mothers who worry are the ones who have the kids best interest at heart, and you'll have great kids for it.
    "for I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you not to harm, plans to give you a future and a hope."
    This is the scripture that keeps me grounded when the worry insomnia kicks in.
    Blessings and prayers of peace and sleep.
    www.virtuouswomanexposed.blogspot.com

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  16. Was going to write that verse but see you are on top of it! I read it just this morning in my devotions.

    I read the MOPS Devotional Bible and always come across the exact thing I need to hear/read for that day. I was feeling similar to you a few months ago, and of course received my answer that morning in devotions.

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  17. thank you
    it is so true
    and so easily forgotten

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  18. Why is it that our minds wonder so much at night? I usually feel better in the morning, but only because the craziness starts and I don't have time to worry.

    One day at a time!

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  19. I love coming to your site--I think you must read my mind with your posts or know what I need to hear. Thank you for your words of wisdom and know they are just what this mom needs to hear.

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  20. Thank you Sarah. Did you write this for me!!?? I'm sure not, but it was just what I needed to hear right now. Moms are all alike, aren't they? Taking on the weight of the world when it comes to wanting the best for our kids. And we worry worry worry about everything possible to worry about. Starting right now I'm going to just worry about tomorrow.

    I already feel better.

    What would I do without your advice/opinions/help/guidance through motherhood and life? You are quite simply the best. Thank you so much for your blog and your friendship.

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  21. Amen!! Yep... so so SO easy to get sucked into the worry path.... guilty! There are so many things that consume a mommy heart...it is crazy! ;)

    my solution is to stay up really really late watching Netflix DVD's until I am exhausted amd pass out... ha ha... just kidding... well... except that I have been doing that a little too much lately!!

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