I know I’m not the only mom of grown children who suffers from this syndrome I just made up.
It can hit at different times of the year. Usually brought on by a change in seasons or change in circumstances, such as children leaving, summer beginning, school starting, weddings, new babies born to anyone, birthdays, graduations, etc. Oh, and looking at scrapbooks, old photos, or God forbid home videos.
Deep yearning for the past-just one day of having them all babies again.
Doubt over wondering if I spent that time appreciating or fully soaking up the stage of life of having littles ones with very few outside obligations- being able to cultivate that “bubble”. Did I spend too much time thinking it would get easier one day instead of harder in different ways?
A fear of starting to really feel the loss and sadness and knowing that if you start crying and really processing it all, you’ll never stop the grief and tears, so better to just take a deep breath and live in the present.
Crazy lady desires like holding babies in grocery stores that aren’t yours, dreaming of baskets of babies left on your doorstep, or wanting to pick up and squeeze every chubby little toddler that walks by. “That” lady who wants to tell the mom of young ones to just slow down and appreciate the days at home, and not make the days rush by filled with activities.
Remember that we all learn by doing, in the moment, day by day, and we’d all do things differently throughout our life looking back.
Deeply deeply appreciate the choices we made to have me stay home and be HERE every day, through it all. Deep gratitude.
Acknowledge that it always is easy to see the cuteness, and not the sleepless nights and inner tension of being at the beck and call of needy little guys all the time.
And most important-one day I will be saying the same thing about THESE days right now.