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Clover Lane

Home » Blog » Pam’s Story

Pam’s Story

by Sarah Turner Clover Lane, Encouragement, Mothering

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(introduction to series here)

…

When Steve and I were dating,

I told him I wanted to be 

a stay at home mom.

I never finished college..

instead I bounced around

from place to place,

job to job

until it was time for me

to settle down,

get married and have children.

20 years

11 moves

and 

4 kids later

our life has been

so far,

a great adventure.

My kids were all born in different places..

Stephen in Ft. Rucker, Alabama

Hannah in Germany

Will in Delaware

Griffin in Massachusetts.

(I admit I’m a little sad we won’t have

a baby born here in Paris 🙂

It seemed with almost every move..

a new baby was in tow.

My husband has always traveled

in his career. 

As a helicopter pilot

in the Army he went to Bosnia for 6 months 

and spent weeks in the field.

(nothing, compared to military wives these days

whose husbands are deployed for much longer

and much more dangerous missions

than I ever had to endure).

When we left the military in 2001 and he started

a different career,

his business travel continued.

I have been the one constant

in my children’s lives.

And I simply cannot imagine it any other way.

In the early years of

our marriage and motherhood,

we had NO money.

Steve was just out of the military

and we bought our first house.

We turned a walk in closet into

a bedroom for Stephen

and Hannah shared our bedroom.

I was pregnant with Will and 

friends would ask..

“how do you all fit in that house?”

I look back on those years and smile.

We worked so hard

together.

Building this family of ours.

With no help.

No cleaning ladies

or

landscapers.

No babysitters

or

construction workers.

Not even help from our own

families as we were 

always miles away from them.

We did everything ourselves.

And it was hard!

But so very worth it.

And

as my children get older..

and begin to start lives of their own,

I hope we’ve taught them 

just that.

I have never felt 

like I’ve sacrificed.

Sure, there were times when I would

have loved a girls weekend away

or a date night with my husband

or even a few hours to get my hair done

but a nursing baby would not allow it.

And now that I have no more 

nursing babies in my future

(believe me, I have grieved!)

I know deep in my heart that

for me

it was more important to always

be there

for my children.

Pam blogs here.

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May 28, 2014 · 14 Comments

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Comments

  1. Billie Jo says

    May 28, 2014 at 1:23 pm

    Sarah, I am an avid reader of Pam's lovely blog.
    Your beautiful blog and her's were among the first I ever read.
    Thank you for including her in your series.
    Her life is sooo much different from my own. Yet so much the same.
    We share, like you, a love of motherhood…a desire and calling to nurture our children and create a place for our families to call home. I love that. : ) I love that somewhere out there, everyday, women are doing exactly what I strive to do…be the best wife, mother, and homemaker I can. Sometimes that is hard to remember in today's world. Thanks for the reminder! : )

    Reply
  2. Denise says

    May 28, 2014 at 1:59 pm

    So beautifully said. I also love Pam's blog. She has such a gift for making you feel like you're talking with her across the kitchen table. It's so evident from her posts that she's a fabulous mom, just like you, Sarah!

    Reply
  3. Mel says

    May 28, 2014 at 5:06 pm

    Such a beautiful story.

    Reply
  4. Hmccracken says

    May 28, 2014 at 9:10 pm

    Thank you for sharing your story! I'm a military wife but my husband will be getting out soon and I know that it will be stressful for a while but I hope to be as strong as you and always find my happiness within my home.I really appreciated reading your story and you have a beautiful family! I love this series!

    Reply
  5. Kathy Olson says

    May 28, 2014 at 11:17 pm

    So beautifully said. IT I'm grieving as I am 51 and will never birth a baby again. I've been blessed to have had seven children, but always wish I could have just one more.

    Reply
  6. Simply LKJ says

    May 29, 2014 at 2:46 am

    Thanks for sharing Pam's story. Looking forward to reading her blog.

    Reply
  7. Valerie says

    May 29, 2014 at 9:36 pm

    Thanks for these stories Sarah. Thank you Pam for sharing with us. This simply makes me smile and is full of hope.

    Reply
  8. Unknown says

    May 30, 2014 at 12:09 am

    All these inspirational and motivating motherhood posts are saving my life. Literally. Thank you!!!

    Reply
  9. Grace in my Heart says

    May 30, 2014 at 3:46 am

    So beautiful! 🙂

    Reply
  10. marlowe says

    May 30, 2014 at 4:20 am

    Do so love Pam!! Can't find how to comment on your most recent post of Ordinary Days but I'm with you. I love to record it, don't want to forget it, but living in it is best of all so if the blogging is sliding, so be it. And .. I love those chunky baby legs. I hope my Charlotte keeps them as long as she can. 🙂

    Reply
  11. Kierstin says

    May 30, 2014 at 4:20 pm

    Hi Sarah! I just read your most recent post about your family. I just wanted to thank you for sharing your family's story & lives with me. You inspire me with your posts. Thank you. I needed to hear the encouragement about children growing up. My last little one has her last day of Kindergarten today and my oldest has her last day of elementary next week. I'm trying not to be sad… But I am. I'm so sad that I won't have little toddlers running around anymore. I am not ready for the 'fast-forward button' of first grade to be pushed. I thought I would be stronger than this, but it's hard. I am so grateful for the precious years I have had to be home with my children while they are small. What precious, priceless time that was! Thank you for the constant reminder to slow down and open my eyes to REALLY see the beauty in each day of my children's lives. Have a beautiful, sunny day! Xo

    Reply
  12. Traci says

    May 30, 2014 at 4:44 pm

    Have you also removed the comment button? Couldn't find it on today's (5/30) post. I've followed your blog since the beginning and I've noticed the big let up in posts. I sure don't blame you for wanting to be more private. I have wondered and worried a few times about some of my favorite bloggers putting so much info about their kids online. Also, I didn't realize how long since you've posted pictures of your kids but I was so amazed at how much older each one of them looked. Wow ,time flies! On being sad….this is a different topic but yesterday I was thinking about all of the mass killings in the U.S. that we hear about on the news and how we are getting used to it. How we cannot get depressed every time because it's like a weekly thing now. I thought we would be perpetually sad. How terrible that it is something we have to become somewhat callous to so that we can try to keep some joy in our lives. I feel awful saying that "out loud". Anyway, same with our babies growing up and dreading the empty nest….we cannot stay in that realm of dread. I have to remind myself that each phase is precious.

    Reply
  13. Traci says

    May 30, 2014 at 10:39 pm

    Also, google has your blog and several other of my favorite sites saved on my homepage and I just click on it. It's there to remind me daily. I also have an email subscription. Are you able to delete those options, to help remain a little more private?

    Reply
  14. Cathy M~(checkitoff) says

    June 21, 2014 at 3:26 pm

    Thank you, Sarah, for sharing Pam's story…I have been a blog follower of both of you for many years and it is a treat to read this! The best part of blogging has been to connect with women who share the same values of mothering. I clearly remember when I gave up the struggle of feeling inadequate as a mom, after reading your blog. Also, I have always been amazed at the effort and time that you have consistently poured into blogging. I am certain that you will find the balance between blogging and your family's privacy. hugs, cathy

    Reply

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