• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • House Love
  • Mothering
  • Recipes
  • Books
  • Tutorials
  • 40 Bags In 40 Days
  • Nav Social Menu

    • Instagram
    • Pinterest
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Contact

Clover Lane

  • Baby Basting
  • Baby Shoes
  • Book Help
  • Baby Torture
  • Hello Baby!
Home ยป Blog ยป On Weaning

On Weaning

by Sarah Turner Clover Lane

Share
Pin
Tweet
Email
Print



Reader Question: Are you planning to let sweet Janet pants self-wean? Have you done that with all your littles? Mine is 1 soon and weaning terrifies me-but so does another year or two of nursing! Any tips or experiences you can share?


I have nursed all my children for at least a year.  I was able (see tips below) to gradually gently wean (no baby angst-I can’t take baby angst, it hurts my heart!) within a few months.  So that means generally give or take I was finished breastfeeding by about 15 months with the five (exception is Janey, more on that below).  As much as I am passionate about breastfeeding and know in my heart its deep importance health-wise and emotionally-wise for both mom and baby, I wanted to throw a nursing- bra burning party in my back yard each time!  But that would be weird.  Can you imagine the invitation?


I know this for sure:  Nursing is time consuming.  It ties us mommies to our babies-we are irreplaceable-we are what keeps them alive.  It’s very very selfless.  It takes lots of energy, physically and emotionally.  It makes us sit down, and slow down.  It rearranges our priorities.  And that is EXACTLY what nature intended.  I know that my babies needed not just the nutrition of the perfect food for babies, but also the emotional “nutrition” also.  I think it’s best for both parties-mom and baby-to take weaning slowly and to be aware of the baby’s needs, whether they fit in the “mold” of our culture or not.


For me I need a little plan to be consistent with the weaning process.  Just like potty training I want to be consistent to make it as stress free as possible for both of us.  It’s not complicated: I take the feeding that is most easily “forgotten” about and drop it. I distract during that time, make sure the baby is being fed enough in meals and snacks, and avoid at all costs my nursing chair or even nursing room.  Springtime and summer is great for this because I can take a stroller ride and get outside during that time and the baby doesn’t even notice.  I just gradually did this until only the nighttime feeding was left. (I don’t have a perfect memory but I think all my babies woke up at night at least once even at one year to nurse.)  This is the hardest feeding to drop, because it’s difficult to distract in the middle of the night.  All of my babes but two took a pacifier so I would just wake up with them when and offer them the pacifier-maybe the first night or two they would protest a little but no hard crying.  I would rock them back to sleep and after one or two or three nights that was that and they were weaned.


Janey, 17 months, is a big nurser…she still nurses 3 or 4 times a day and at least once or twice at night.  She never took a bottle or a pacifier.  I feel like right now, my mom gut tells me that she needs a little more time. I am thinking this spring we are going to work on dropping day time feeds slowly and then we’ll work on the night time.  I never planned to nurse this long, honestly.  I said at her first birthday, “My goal is to be finished this month”, then I said by Christmas, and now I am saying by spring.  I just know she needs to take this slow, and that’s OK with me.  

For more help I always refer to Dr. Sears-I love his books-The Baby Book was my first year reference book for all my babies,  and I think he is right on spot with just about everything from birth to breastfeeding help to discipline.  Here is a short article of his on weaning. 


Share
Pin
Tweet
Email
Print

January 26, 2014 ยท 22 Comments

Follow by Email

Previous Post: « Menu For The Week
Next Post: Parenting With Grace-A Book Study »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recipe Rating




Comments

  1. Karin - BluePip Designs says

    January 26, 2014 at 6:41 pm

    This is exactly how I weaned my older two, one at 15 months and one at 26. My current little is almost 16 months and we do one daytime and 3-4 nighttime feedings. I tried night weaning him (no pacifier for him) and I had to quit because I was a zombie during the day. I keep saying spring as well, but really I don't mind the nursing cuddles so we'll see what happens.

    Reply
  2. jen-o says

    January 26, 2014 at 7:02 pm

    That's the thing, all babies are different. My older one was weaned at 14 months when I was 2 months pregnant and wanted a break before starting to feed the next one. My younger son nursed until he was 2. This third baby – who knows?? It's a lot harder to "cut them off" when you co-sleep as well. Not sure if we will fall into that with the new baby as well.

    Reply
  3. Ainsley says

    January 26, 2014 at 9:30 pm

    I've just loved reading this ….. I've just weaned my 6th baby aged 26 months. Like you, I've fed all of mine until around 12 months but with each one the weaning process has taken a little longer. It's been a gentle process for everyone. My little Eliza still prefers to sleep with my husband and I but now, instead of reaching out for milk in the night, she cuddles and quickly resettles. Some beautiful messages in this post for all Mum's xx

    Reply
  4. Andrea Dekker says

    January 26, 2014 at 9:40 pm

    Thanks Sarah! This post made me smile and "wince" all at the same time. My first experience with nursing was SOOOO NOT what I expected. First of all, it was extremely easy and never painful like so many people told me it would be. We had no issues, no problems, and it felt way more natural than I thought it would (although I still wouldn't do it in public)

    However, it was so easy for both of us, that Nora quickly started refusing any sort of pacifier, bottle (breast milk or formula), etc. and there I was, totally "stuck" as the only source of food for my baby girl. I should also mention that she refused ALL baby food, ALL pureed foods, and ALL solid foods until 18-20 months so she literally would not eat anything unless I was there to nurse her.

    Although the act of nursing was so easy and she literally "sucked it down" in 7-8 minutes flat, I felt totally trapped and started getting depressed wondering when this would ever stop.

    We finally started eating therapy around 17 months (and then I unexpectedly got pregnant when she was 18 months) and with the combination of the two, she basically weaned herself over the next 3 months (and yes, we had to avoid her nursing chair like the plague otherwise that's all she could think about!)

    Looking back, it honestly wasn't that bad, I just can't get over how trapped I felt for a while there at the end. I thought it was interesting that whenever I voice concern over her lack of eating prior to her first birthday, everyone said "oh, just nurse until she's 1". However, practically the day after her first birthday I started getting comments like "you're still nursing her?" "when are you going to wean her?"

    I should just keep reading your posts for a more normal perspective from a mom who obviously knows a little something about what she's doing ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  5. Colleen says

    January 26, 2014 at 9:47 pm

    I never had to wean my kids, they either speed on their own our I ran out of milk (working and pumping) but what heeled to break them from the bedtime and middle of the night bottle was to give thema cup of milk. They could have a so if they were truly hungry, but it didn't soothe like a bottle or breast and they stopped depending on that for sleep. You moms that breastfeed longer than a year are amazing in my book!

    Reply
  6. mmommo1 says

    January 26, 2014 at 10:43 pm

    told my husband about that pic of Janey (pants)!
    i would have a hard time weaning too…..

    Reply
  7. Sarah says

    January 26, 2014 at 11:03 pm

    I was wondering about when you would wean…I am a 26 yo catholic mom of 2 aged 3 and 1. Just weaned at 15mo. I really trust your common sense mixed with love approach and very much enjoy reading your blog; I *do* trust you as a wiser older mom on the internet!! We really need to hear your voice on the world wode web. Thanks for posting.

    Reply
  8. Tatiana says

    January 27, 2014 at 1:18 am

    Sarah, thank you for this! I have 3 kids. My two older ones both weaned easily by about 14 months or so.. but I don't think my youngest is even close to done. She still wakes up once a night to nurse. And the times that I've tried "distracting" her with cuddles, a song, etc. She just screams louder and longer. So I always give in. Thanks for cheering me up and making me feel better ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  9. Maggie says

    January 27, 2014 at 1:29 am

    Speaking of reading extensively- can you recommend some good parenting books that you have found useful? Thank you!

    Reply
  10. valerie says

    January 27, 2014 at 3:36 am

    Janey's soul sister Lily is still nursing the same schedule. I always tell Mindy when she needs to go read your blog. Parallel lives I tell ya! That picture is priceless.

    Reply
  11. Traci says

    January 27, 2014 at 3:45 am

    I loved this post Sarah. All mine weaned themselves. I think because I ran out of milk around a year. So many of my friends nursed until around 2 and it was wonderful for them. When the time is right for everyone it just seem to work out.

    Reply
  12. luvnmy10 says

    January 27, 2014 at 1:00 pm

    I nursed 9 out of my 10 children and loved every single second of it! It is one of the bonds I hate to see broken… the last physical tie between me and my baby. My philosophy has always been to let the baby take the lead and most often they have self weaned as yours, around 15 months, some longer, some shorter. My last little guy never once nursed, and being 45, I had not been able to get a good supply with the pump, so when even my lactation specialist said sometimes it just isn't going to work out, I gave in and bought formula. It was heart breaking, I literally sobbed for days. I decided that no one was allowed to give him bottles, ever, it was my opportunity to sit and feed him, for me. So, you ladies who are able to breastfeed, love it, enjoy it, and cherish that wonderful God given ability to nurture and nourish your sweet little baby for as long as they like ๐Ÿ™‚ Just advice from an "old" mom :).

    Reply
  13. Unknown says

    January 27, 2014 at 2:12 pm

    I won't be weaning anyone anytime son (single. no kids.) but oh my, that picture. how darling. ๐Ÿ™‚
    ~ Country Girl's Daybook, recently posted: A Movie Review of The Book Thief โ†’ http://bit.ly/1eSRAS0

    Reply
  14. Victoria says

    January 27, 2014 at 2:36 pm

    "It makes us sit down, and slow down. It rearranges our priorities. And that is EXACTLY what nature intended." Oh my, I love this! I am nursing an 8 week old and some days it is overwhelming that I am his sole source of nourishment but on the other hand, it does make me sit and slow down and enjoy him. Thank you for these posts and your thoughts on these matters. I never take away that you know it all or that you think everyone should do it your way. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  15. Christine says

    January 27, 2014 at 6:23 pm

    I nursed my baby girl till she was 2 1/2. She would have gladly continued till 4. or 5!! I had to wean her. She still loves to snuggle with me with her nukky. I am her comfort and I don't mind one bit. Those babies at the end get to stay babies for a long time! Your baby is adorable!

    Reply
  16. Ye Olde Wielder O' Projects says

    January 27, 2014 at 9:09 pm

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    Reply
  17. Melissa says

    January 27, 2014 at 9:10 pm

    My #6 will be 2 this week. Oh how sad! He still nurses a few times a day, and I am ok with it. I have considered weaning completely but my sweet husband reminded me how good it is for me to sit down with him for a few minutes and snuggle. He won't nurse forever. My approach is the same as yours… distract and engage in something else… and remember it won't last forever.

    Reply
  18. Rach says

    January 28, 2014 at 4:12 am

    Love dr sears! I shouldn't be surprised that you do too, because I love you and your style.

    Reply
  19. John and Anna says

    January 28, 2014 at 9:12 am

    Thank you for sharing this! It's very timely for me, as I've been trying to figure out what to do about my little just-turned-two nursling. I appreciate your perspective and also that article by Dr. Sears. So helpful!

    Reply
  20. Jenny says

    January 28, 2014 at 2:19 pm

    Hazel is my third baby (the only girl, her brothers are 6 & 4) and she is a week younger than Janey. I nursed both my boys till they were 1. I will nurse Hazel until she is ready to stop because you are absolutely right, time goes way too fast and you can't get it back. Oh, and Hazel still wants to nurse about 5 times during the day and at her bedtime feeding but, luckily, not during the night!

    Thank you for sharing your experience and letting us be a part of your world!! Hope everyone is doing great!!!

    Reply
  21. Heather says

    February 7, 2014 at 4:41 am

    Very, very sweet photo ๐Ÿ™‚
    Thanks for your advice in all areas on your blog. Your openness to mentor has blessed me over the years.

    Reply
  22. Unknown says

    February 14, 2014 at 4:38 am

    Weaning is hard business! I love the advice you gave. It is pretty much howbibhave gone about weaning. I also like Dr. Jay Gordon's weaning method.

    Reply

Primary Sidebar

Welcome!

Sarah Turner

When our first baby was placed in my arms I knew there was no place I wanted to be other than home with him every day. Twenty five years, and five more babies later, (six children, now ages 26-8), I still feel the same. I blog here about motherhood, how to make a house a home, easy recipes, and simple living. You can read more about me here.

21 years of our best-loved, most-used quality toys!

Follow by Email

Recent Posts

  • Sorting, Saving and Storing Children’s Keepsakes-A Quick and Easy Guide for Busy Moms
  • No-Clutter Easter Basket Ideas
  • Favorite Kitchen Items
  • Favorite Smoothie Recipe
  • Bathroom Organization-Five Tips For Purging and Organization

Topics

Amazon Affiliate Disclaimer

Clover Lane is participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites. Read my disclosure.

Nothing pretty, flashy, or spectacular. Just an o Nothing pretty, flashy, or spectacular.  Just an ordinary Monday morning breakfast counter after the kids leave for school.  Because ordinary gets the short hand in our culture but really it's extra special. 
It's a symbol of unselfishness, contentment, prudence and gratitude.  There is a certain peace about the ordinary.  It's the opposite of temporary-it holds the joy of contentment and gratitude and prudence all in one hand.  It's lends itself toward peace, and a settling in, not a constant search for more or less or anything.  Ordinary is authentic and good enough- in short it's a gem in disguise. ๐Ÿƒ
I love my home and I hope you do also. With all t I love my home and I hope you do also.  With all the imperfections and maintenance it requires, when I pull up and walk in I want to stay, to relax, to feel safe, for daily life to be easy, and to care for "home". I want simplicity, ease, convenience.  To me when my home is simple, without being filled to the brim of things that just take up space I love it best.  I hope if you've participated fully or even partially as time allowed in 40 Bags in 40 Days you've found that joy and pride in your home.  I plan to share more little challenges and tips as the year proceeds to trouble shoot areas and keep maintenance effortless and the house love flowing.  Daily life in our homes should bring us joy and ease while we care for our families, we should be thoughtful stewards of our money and of our time and simple living is the answer to that. 
Thank you for participating! ๐Ÿก
I think this is one of the best things about the 4 I think this is one of the best things about the 40 Bag decluttering process.  When I know what I have and have removed all that I don't, it cultivates more discretion and caution about what I bring back in.  I think there is also some realization of how much money is wasted on fads, or thoughtless purchases.  It's quite eye-opening.  I've become so much more careful, and find we all take better care of things, as do my children.
The final week of 40 Bags in 40 Days! I've tackle The final week of 40 Bags in 40 Days!  I've tackled all the areas of my home with exception of my oldest daughter's room (not the photo)- which she is excited to work on this week.
The simpler the room, the easier it is to clean an The simpler the room, the easier it is to clean and straighten up.  And then the more enjoyable it is to actually sit in that room.  It's not a hard equation, all it takes is ruthless purging-and not just little things but larger items also.  Functional furniture is the key and very few decorative pieces especially when children are in the home, makes life so much easier. 
๐Ÿƒ
As we head into the last week of the 40 Bags in 40 As we head into the last week of the 40 Bags in 40 Days Challenge I'm hearing from so many of you what a difference it has made in your appreciation of your homes, a certain contentment, and at the same time a thrill of looking in on the organized kitchen, closet and living space.  I agree!  I love purging, cleaning and organizing a space and then going back later that day just to get that wonderful sense of accomplishment.  It makes such a difference! 
๐Ÿƒ
A lighter, fresher, calmer home is the result of de-cluttering.  I even had a participant who had been planning on listing her home, start 40 Days just to get her house ready to sell, and then was so ruthless in the process and also thrilled by the results that they decided to stay put in what seemed like a new home to them.  What a savings of time, money and energy. 
๐Ÿƒ
Next week I will be talking maintenance and answer all questions! โ˜€๏ธ
Tips For Shared Kids Rooms- This bedroom has seen Tips For Shared Kids Rooms-
This bedroom has seen every configuration possible.  With kids spread out 18 years apart, I've had to be creative over the years-which I think is the key to sharing rooms.  It is all possible-I consider it a rare luxury and privilege to not have to share a room although I know that is not the norm today. 
๐Ÿƒ
I like to create a simple look with white furniture (this ends up making room transitions easier also when moving someone out and someone else in.) I also like to match bedspreads for a cohesive look. 
๐Ÿƒ
Clip on bed lights save space. 
๐Ÿƒ
A simple shared book shelf can hold a child's special books and knick knacks and if necessary can be assigned per shelf.
๐Ÿƒ
When my kids were younger I had my dad build me a large wooden roll out box for under each bed.  This held each child's toys. 
๐Ÿƒ
All clothes are kept in a closet instead of dressers to save space.
I feel like I bailed on everyone following 40 Bags I feel like I bailed on everyone following 40 Bags progress and tips.  My excuse is the stomach flu ravaging us all here in the last week with me being the last to fall and the slowest to recover.  On top of that the weekend before I tried to roller blade (don't even ask how many steps I made it) and majorly bit it.  Thankfully I think I just sprained my arm. So I've been using one arm for nursing sick children back to health, and doing whatever cleaning and cooking and straightening I can do.  Alas, last week was a wash.  We have two weeks to go.  I'd like to continue and end on a high note.  How about you?  Even a little de-cluttering counts! Spring is in the air and I can't wait to throw open my windows and let fresh clean air circulate through my fresh clean orderly home. โ˜€๏ธ๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒฑ
Especially where kids are concerned- we tend to th Especially where kids are concerned- we tend to think that the more things they have the happier and more occupied and loved they will feel.  Nothing can replace human interaction and I've found that too many toys has the reverse affect.  They cause overwhelm-just like us - we'd rather sit in an orderly space than one filled with too many things to do and too much stuff.
โ˜€๏ธ
When it comes to kids closets here are some tips-
1. Hand me downs don't all have to be received.  Or received at all.  Be choosy and keep just what they will use and need.
2. When children are presented with too many choices, tension and acrimony can exist.  Being able to open a closet with a reasonable amount of outfits can create more peace.
3. Cultivating independence in care of clothes is easier when there is less and the space is simplified and organized. 
โ˜€๏ธ
More tips coming on the blog this week.  I am moving my blog platform so I can't make any promises - it's under construction and that's exciting!
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Disclosure

Copyright © 2021 ยท Memories on Clover Lane ยท All Rights Reserved
Please do not duplicate anything on this blog without written permission from the author.
Disclosure: Amazon affiliate links used.