Loved this. Thanks for being honest enough to risk putting this out there in blog world. I especially loved the part about your boys and sex. I think so often we tell our girls about the dangers of pregnancy but not our guys. You brought up excellent points. I may save this for my kids!
Thank you for speaking the TRUTH. I'm a very new mama, and I oftentimes get so overwhelmed thinking about what my baby (and other children I will hopefully have) will face in this lifetime and it scares me. The world has changed so much, in even my lifetime. So many people feel entitled in our country, and the fabrics of our country and of our selves is shifting. You nailed it perfectly. Your words are beautiful. I especially love your words to your daughters…as a woman (and a daughter), I know what you say to your daughters is so true, but sometimes I feel that others devalue what I'm doing (raising my baby full-time) and think I'm throwing my life away. Thank you thank you THANK YOU for your poignant thoughts, and thank you for living truth out loud.
I. LOVE. This. LOVE this. I have been reading your blog for something like… many, many years (at least since Patrick was a newborn!). This is THE best post I've read by you (and I have read EVERY single post– I stayed up late one night when the hubs was out of town and read ALL of your older posts), and that's saying something, since I agree with 99.99% of what you say, all the time. 🙂
Your children and your hubby are so lucky to have you. Thanks for inspiring so many moms!!! And thanks for taking a stand, when the world continues to silence voices like ours.
Love this! The only part I can't relate to is being catholic, but you have so many wonderful points in this letter. It's so sad to think about the world our children are growing up in. Right now, my kids are small, and I can keep them insulated to some degree, but that is changing quickly as they begin school and are out in the world more (and they are in a Christian school). I always love reading your blog- your experiences in motherhood are always spot on and offer so much encouragement! Thank you for this post, you said everything that children these days NEED to hear!
Agree agree agree!!! Our country has forgotten about old-fashioned hard work and sacrifice…I'm usually the opinionated one spouting off whether people want to hear it or not…refreshing to hear your standpoint!
Well said. Well said!! We need more Moms like you! While I am not a Catholic, I can relate to you as a mom. Your way of thinking is so refreshing and encouraging! And I love your blog and recommend it to overwhelmed mothers I meet along the way.
~Starla
LOVE this! And thank you. My oldest is 5 and I often find myself wondering how my generation has gotten so many things wrong. What will their future look like? I think there are a lot of smaller voices who agree that just get overshadowed by the bigger ones. Thank you for willing to post something you believe and not apologize for it.
Absolutely loved this! I even just now read some of it out loud to my daughter who walked into the room and we are both cheering you on. I am a foster mom and I see firsthand the heartache of living the opposite of this. One of our foster baby's mommas would keep asking and asking my oldest (unmarried) daughter when she was going to have a baby. It finally stopped when my daughter just said, "I am not married." It seemed so novel to the mom!
I do admit, I did laugh out loud when you described what was on the side of the you tube screen. It is an awful thing to see, but your honest description made me glad I hadn't taken a sip of coffee!
Love your blog and your insight. Thank you for sharing!
Sarah, that is absolutely brilliant & beautiful. It echoes so much of what we are trying to teach our boys. We continue on, even though I fear it just won't matter before they truly reach adulthood.
I love our country too, and we are teaching love of country, but it truly makes me sad to see what our country is rapidly turning into.
Sarah,
As a Mormon living in your same town I am so thankful for good parents like you who are raising good children. I am so thankful for the strong Catholic influence in our town and for our shared beliefs on raising children, sex, budgeting, and God. Thank you for not making excuses for your beliefs but for sharing them proudly. It makes it easier for me to have good moms around.
Amen Sarah! We need to be saying this to our kids. We need to be the examples. We need to lead….
That comment above – that makes my blood boil! It's judgemental and rude. I have read plenty of posts where you talk about church. And to call your daughter a goody-goody….ack…I have to bite my tongue or you will moderate me right out of the comments.
I love this and plan on reading it to my two oldest. You hit the nail on the head. I love the part where you tell them to be proud of being Catholic. We live in a small town where we have only the one Catholic Church and we are surrounded by many, many non Catholics and my kids have been told terrible things about thier faith by people who are normally "God fearing" folks who just don't understand. I taught our confirmation class last year and we did a whole class on how to respond to the very bad things said to them for their faith. I was shocked at the things they have had to listen to. Thank you for sharing this with us.
Blessings to you
Sarah,.I am so proud of you for writing this and being bold in your beliefs…I am not a Catholic, but I am a Christian~I have to say, so many people not only deny the Holy Spirit but totally ignore the vices of Satan, and the influence and lies he spreads… Hollywood IS a place that is pushing things at our kids faster than we can sometimes block from them…We are in crazy, dark days~Jesus is the only Light and I wonder how people who deny Him can raise their kids alone in this world…thanks for posting if for nothing else than helping this Mom (&dad) know we are not the only people outside our area who feel like this…somedays you feel like it's just you and the people you worship with…that outside of that the whole world thinks you are crazy. This has been a great boost for me today..Be Blessed and Carry on Sister!!!
Wow. Loved this and would love to give a copy to each of our children. I haven't ever commented before, but love to read your blog and appreciate your insight. We belong to different religions, but I love for my children to see that there are many good people in the world who live and believe in the same values as we do. Sometimes I think we forget how many people are still quietly living good, honorable lives because all the "yuck" speaks so much louder. Thank you for making a stand.
This was an awesome post. I am printing this and putting it away to share with my children someday (too young now). You've so eloquently put a lot of the things that my husband and I discuss on a daily basis. How have we come so far from what we once stood for? How can people look at what are society is today and say that it is ok? We, too, are proudly raising our children as Catholics, despite the ridicule we hear directed towards our church daily. Thank you for having the courage to stand up and say everything you have said in a public forum.
I really like how blunt you are, and that you had the courage to point out a lot of the "hidden" crap in our culture. Sometimes it can all be so very overwhelming. May I make one tiny point? In the first paragraph to your boys–which I love–you wrote 'rely on yourself'. Perhaps also remind them to rely on God even more? Goodness knows parenting and working and just living is much too tough on our own. (On the other hand, this is your blog, not mine so if you ignore me that's ok:)
Sarah,
I love your blog! You are an example of a Godly, loving mother and it is so refreshing.
Everything you said in this letter is spot on. I will have my teens read this….
America has forgot its manners and respect I am afraid.
Good job!
And keep the great parenting coming…
Blessings to you and your sweet family!
Preach it sister! I'm not Catholic but Lutheran and I fear what will happen to my children's faith when they are grown. I also feel like I'm the only parent who is trying so hard to teach my kids good morals and manners. So glad I'm not alone. Thank you for sharing this.
So well said!! I check your blog each day and this is the first time I have commented. i have 2 boys 17 and 20. I am going to print this out and let them read it. I feel we have raised them well but I love to have them read things that open a dialogue.
Spoken from the heart and really terrific. Thanks!
I think I'm about the same age as your oldest child- I found this so interesting, as someone who has also been raised catholic, I think everyone has to make their own way, and decide what's right for them, I think even if you are catholic, maybe you do have to pick and choose what you believe, for me anyway…it's all a bit confusing sometimes but I like that you just spoke your mind here.
I have never commented in the year I have been reading your blog, but this post deserves a comment. Thank you for being willing to call it as you see it and to speak out in defense of good old fashioned moral living. Our children need to hear more voices like this.
Wow! Amazing and so necessary. I expect you'll receive lots of controversial comments about this because it was bold. But if we aren't bold as parents raising our children, someone else will be. This is amazing, inspired, and brave. I hope you print it out for each of your children to keep with them forever. They will certainly have many occasions to take it out and read it over and over, I'm sure. Thanks for being bold not only with your children, but with all of us, too.
You have said it ALL! Brava!!!!! Actually, this made me cry because I feel the same way and try not to let it overwhelm me on most days. It is reassuring to this mama of 7 to know that there are parents out there who are trying to still guide their kids correctly in their Faith and everyday lives. Bless you, Sarah.
Thank you. I sent this to my teenage daughter to read. I told her we didn't have to discuss it, but she MUST read it. Everything you said is what I want to say to my kids, if they would ever listen. I have to make them listen.
I love this SOOO much! I agree with everything you wrote, with the substitution of my own religion in the place of yours. =)
Thank you so very much for posting this. We all need more support in making good choices and saying no to things that will always be bad, no matter how many people say it's right.
Great to read this today. I am also Catholic, and agree with every single thing you wrote. It was brave, and I applaud you for having the courage to post it.
May God give you the grace you need to deal with the comments that are bound to come your way that we readers won't ever know about.
Excellent post, Sarah! Excellent, excellent! My friend and i were just talking this morning about reality TV and the trash that is on. I know TWO young girls in their twenties who are unmarried and having babies and it scares me to raise my girls in this world. Thank you for this.
I believe the holy Spirit was with you in this moment! …praise god!…we need more moms like you your kids are so lucky to have you..its so so true old fashioned morals are going out the window…
Love, love, love this motherly wisdom. Very well written and much needed admonishment for this next generation we're rearing. I so love your blog. Thank you for sharing this with those of us who cannot articulate as well!! I've passed this on for my son to read.
as a new mother and as someone who has read your blog for a long time, i have felt so at home and cozy in your blog. and i am always left feeling empowered and have so enjoyed reading about the way you parent – simply with old-fashioned ideas. it is the way i was raised and my husband and i strive every day to instill the same values in our son. you have inspired me as a woman and as a mother. and while this post began as a refreshing reminder, it soon broke my heart. i appreciate your values and i understand that this is your forum, but i am sure you know that you alienated some readers with your position on abortion. of course, it is presumed that people who practice catholism are pro-life, but what surprised me was the words you chose…"kill", "murder". isn't there a more delicate way of asserting your beliefs? one that may take into consideration that a woman reading this post may be sitting at her kitchen table, nursing her baby, and suddenly finds herself bombarded with painful memories of being sexually assaulted, subsequently impregnated and scheduling an abortion…? i am not here to begin an argument. and i still respect you as a brave blogger and as a mother who is simply trying to teach her children what she believes is right. i jut thought that i too would be brave and would offer another side to the story. although i am a bit sad disheartened, i accept that this blog is your space, that we are all entitled to our opintions, and i remain a faithful reader, sarah.
I enjoyed reading this post and you raised so many valuable points. I commend you. I really treasure some of the traditions and beliefs you outlined but wish you had a more open mind. Not everything is as black and white as you describe. Reading it I wondered if you also consider gay and lesbian people sinners? I surely hope not. I hope for my children so be more inclusive than the generation I am part of today. Thanks for posting this and developing a forum where people can engage in some of these important conversations.
Thank you for those beautiful, heart-felt words. I feel the same way but you said it so eloquently. Your children are blessed to have you for their mother.
I agree with you 100%, Sarah. These values come through in your posts and are the reason you are one of my favorites. To someone looking in at MY life, I think the expectation might be that my opinion would be quite different, but I think I am a living example of parents not preaching this truth. I am divorced; I made a poor choice and now I live with the repercussions. Every day is also a chance to live more in line with what I know to be right, though. So, thank you for writing Truth.
Thank you for your post today….I am new mom to two older children…and I feel I have to undo wht their lives was before us and build into them morals; at the same time bonding with them teach them to trust,and love us. I think that if you build it they will follow…..my parents were strict and I was curious but in the end I ended up marrying my one true and first love, and to my last days I follow discretion,kindness,accountability ….and I question my own integrity always ….I hope to be my children's example and that everything I sat and each them they will also follow.
Thank you,
I'm not of your faith but I share many of your beliefs and celebrate our Chrisitian similarities. I LOVE your priorities, and I love this letter. It feels so empowering to know somebody out there is teaching abstinence til marriage and self control in all aspects of life. God bless you and your family.
Although I disagree with you in some of your points, I think the letter is a great way to express your feelings about how you raise your children and all the turmoil in this world we live in today.
The only thing I disagree with you on *holding up my hands to cover from all the backlash* is that I won't raise my daughter to depend on anyone…specifically a man. I'm going to go out on a limb and assume you've never had a man whom who've depended on walk out of your life and not look back…even when you NEVER thought he had a bone in his body capable of deserting his family.
I personally will not raise my daughter to believe that her only place is in the home raising babies her whole life. Could it be a PART of her life? Sure HUGE part? Sure! But not exclusively. If she's blessed enough to be able to stay home, wonderful.
But I also want her raised to know that should that "oh so wonderful man" up and walk out on her and those children, that she can pick herself up off the floor and raise her children herself, without the need for everyone to feel sorry for her and sit around and mope because some man she gave up everything for backed out on "the deal".
She chooses to have those children just as much as he did…and I personally don't want her to expect any man to be any more financially responsible for those children than she is. I've seen WAY too many women hurt by the "big bad mean ole' husband" who went out and met the "oh so hot" secretary or even decided that their wife "just wasn't doin' it for them anymore". Is he an ass? Sure. But it happens, and I don't want my daughter to feel she's a victim in that situation. I want her to hold her chin high and say "I can do this on my own." And mean it.
Just my opinion of course on that subject, but I'm RIGHT there with you on the rest. Thank you for this post, I love reading your writing. 🙂
Sarah, I'm with you on so many points…..Staci, also, has very valid advice…….hats off to both of you!! (I'm at the stage of watching my grandchildren grow……it was always a challenge to be a parent but I have to say the obstacles are ten-fold now.)
Thank you for writing this! As a Catholic woman, married and raising 3 young children, I agree and appreciate every word you wrote! I admire and look up to you- you are a shining example for us rookie, Catholic mothers, attempting to raise up a new generation to be unspoiled by the world. Many blessings to your family!
Oh, how I love this post. I wish every person in the world was raised with such wonderful values. Our world would surely be a different place. I look up to you so much Sarah!
Thank you for not being afraid to pour out your heart, especially during Lent. As a fellow Catholic and momma of three young boys I too worry about the future of our country and world. It is all changing so fast. I agree with you in every point and hope that more people continue to hold fast to the truth and to their faith! God bless you!
Amen and Amen. I agree. My heart aches with what is presented int he world as normal and okay. I struggle with ways to explain and show my children what is right and good in the eyes of God when the world tells them that if we practice what God says is right and good, we are being evil and judgemental. God bless you and your honest spirit!
I rarely comment but my thoughts match almost entirely. As a Catholic mama, are there books that have helped guide you? I find myself in circles with Catholics turned Christian–who bad mouth or question my practices. I need resources that help me stand strong and firm in my Catholic faith.
Several of your points have been hot topics in our house this week with Jackson! This is a great example of what the blog world has done for me….glean from extraordinary mothers, like yourself and feel I'm not alone in teaching values to my children in a morally declining world.
Keep it up! You are doing so much good.
If I could stand up and applaud you right now, I would. Thank you for writing this and for passing on to your children the kind of morals and principals this world needs more of. I love your blog!
Way to go, Sarah! I love your motherly wisdom. I had to explain abortion to my 11 yr. old daughter a while ago – and she COULD NOT BELIEVE people would do that to their unborn babies.
I am not Catholic, but as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints I could have written this whole thing. These are my exact feelings about the world my kids are facing. Thank you for being a consistently bold force for GOOD!
Beautifully, lovingly stated! I LOVE this idea and think I will write a letter to my grandchildren. The world has gotten SO far away from good old fashioned values and as mothers, it's our responsibility to teach them to our children. You're a brave, strong, righteous woman and personally, I find it refreshing to see someone stand up for what they believe!! Bravo!!
~Mary
Bravo!! I hope you don't mind me printing this off and sharing it with my kids someday. I agree with you 100% and I feel so old fashioned! Thanks for your example.
Thank you for sharing your letter to your children with us. I shared it with my own daughter as there were so many things I have wanted to say to her but couldn't verbalize. Thank you.
I love this post Sarah and will definitely make sure my husband and two children read it. I have read through some of the comments and don't feel that you need to be Catholic to agree, or disagree, with the message. I was raised Catholic and still have strong Catholic values; however, I left the structured Catholic church for a smaller Catholic-based church(not associated with the Boston Archdiocese). The message is the same and yet the guilt is less. Our children are some of the youngest (11 & 14) who attend and they get the message –which is quite similar to yours. My husband and I have wonderful families and quote our parents and grandparents often. As my college professor said "you would not be a good person if your parents weren't good people"!!
This one post sums up why if I had to choose just one blog to read for the rest of my days, it would be yours.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
And for anyone reading Sarah's touching words about healing after an abortion, I highly recommend visiting hopeafterabortion.org and abortionchangesyou.org.
What a great post and letter to your children. I am not Catholic, but am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons), and completely agree with you. It's wonderful to see in such a crazy world with so much filth that there are women like me that are trying to keep filth out and instead fill our homes with all good things from God.
I have read your blog for a few years now, and haven't commented before though many times I wanted to say Amen! I love the honesty and straightforwardness that you are raising your children with. This post is brilliant. As a fellow Catholic, I know how hard it is to raise children with values and morals when they are being bombarded by the world all the time. I will definitely be sharing this letter with my 3 daughters. I'm sure you have probably gotten some not so nice comments, ignore them, and keep letting the Holy Spirit guide you. God Bless you and your wonderful family!
Hi Sarah,
I have never commented before but I thought this letter captured how I have been feeling with my own kids. Although I'm not Catholic, I am a Christian and I feel that so many more of us, mothers, fathers, adults in general need to hear more if this truth. There are days when I feel, as a mother, that I am swimming against the tide and it becomes stressful or I just want to cave BUT it is so helpful to hear that there are still parents who feel the way I do. Thank you so much for this and know that it was such an encouragement to so many!
Thankyou for being breve enough to write this. I'm british and protestant bu agree with the whole sentiment. I'll go to bed tonight feeeling a little les alone in my mission to bring my kids up right. Thankyou!
Thankyou for being breve enough to write this. I'm british and protestant bu agree with the whole sentiment. I'll go to bed tonight feeeling a little les alone in my mission to bring my kids up right. Thankyou!
Thankyou for being breve enough to write this. I'm british and protestant bu agree with the whole sentiment. I'll go to bed tonight feeeling a little les alone in my mission to bring my kids up right. Thankyou!
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I have been feeling so overwhelmed lately by what is going on in our country and our culture. I agree 100% with everything you said. We need to all stand up for what we believe in and stop the moral relativism that is invading our country. Thank you for having the courage to say what you believe. You are my hero today 🙂
thank you for such a beautiful and BOLD post! i love how unapologetic you are in sharing your beliefs. especially when many of them are "hot topics" and many in our society would claim your values and beliefs are old fashioned. but they are not! those values are still relevant today and so, so very needed. thank you for your wonderful example and courageous mothering!
Also, regarding the comment that we should use kindler, gentler terms than "kill" and "murder" for abortion – I believe we NEED to use terms like that so that young girls who believe they're just "removing a blob of cells" know it's really a BABY and that yes, they are paying someone to kill it.
Hi Sarah, Thanks for this post. I found it so reassuring. I'm not Catholic (I am Muslim) but identify with SO many of the things you talk about. It's really comforting to hear from someone else who has much more experience raising children (mine are only 6 and 3 yrs old). Best wishes, Maryam
Sarah…keep letting your light shine! What a wonderful letter for your children (I am going to share it with mine!) and so REFRESHING to hear! I love it! You are a gift to your children and to all those around you. It is great to know that we have a sisterhood of mothers from different backgrounds and faiths that value hard work, thrift, and moral values. GIves me hope for the future! YAHOO! AMEN!
What a beautiful letter of TRUTH. I couldn't agree with you more. Sarah, {and I mean this in the most non-cheesy way} you have been such an inspiration as I mother my children. Each topic you address I find myself nodding in agreement and wondering aloud why there aren't more of us with common sense and logic out there.
We're expecting our fourth {a little girl after three boys!} and I often wonder what sort of world our children will grow up in. But you reminded me yet again why we go to such great lengths to protect and teach our children the hard truths of this world. Thank you for such an encouraging letter!
Love, love, love, love, love this post, Sarah. As always. And thank you for calling abortion what it is. The taking of a life at any other stage = murder. I'm always amazed how people lie to themselves and try to say that the killing of a baby in the womb is not.
Be prepared for this to go VIRAL. I'm not kidding. Just be ready to say "Yes" or "No" to morning talk shows, CNN, whatever. You have struck a chord which usually happens when someone writes something brave and honest and true.
This is wonderful! Thank you for standing up for good morals and standards! How much we all need to be reminded of these things often now days. You are a wonderful Mom! By the way, my youngest and your Janey were born on the same day.
I am not catholic, but I 100% agree with you and I RESPECT you for publicly saying these things!! So true, so important and so brave!! These are the things I will tell my children as they grow up, and I love your example in how to say it – thank you!
Thank you, Sarah! As a fellow Catholic mom myself, your steadfast words are music to my ears. I agree 100% with your whole letter, and I am so grateful for your blog. We have to keep fighting this evil in the world for our children's sake. Just delete the inevitable nasty, ignorant, in denial, and rationalizing comments you will surely also receive from your honest words. Keep fighting the good fight!
thank you. i whole heartedly agree!!! how can we harness the power of like-minded moms to influence popular culture????? i love this letter and will share it with my children…
From across the Atlantic Ocean I applaude . As a Catholic mom of four , from the other side of the world . Living in a mostly Catholic country but only a few churches are full on Sundays because people values aren't what they used to be. They rather go shopping and not go to mass on Sundays. It saddens me.
My country is full of lovely and old Catholic Churches that are empty. But I applaude you for your letter to your children and I am going to show it to my two oldest .
I apologize for any errors in my English . I'm not a native speaker, although I can read English the writing part is very rusty…
Thank you again for your letter
Rita
While I agree with so many parts of the post, I also whole heartedly agree with Lauren's comment. As I continued to read this morning I felt so sad. Sad for those where life is not always black and white, decisions are painful and that I could not possibly know the pain another woman might be going through because I haven't been in anybody's shoes but my own. So many good things that us parents must teach & hopefully guide our children through the craziness so that they won't ever face those situations…or hopefully make the right choice. And unfortunately, there are so many bad parents are out there too who don't care like you and your readers. As always, thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Love & compassion…
Lauren…
"as a new mother and as someone who has read your blog for a long time, i have felt so at home and cozy in your blog. and i am always left feeling empowered and have so enjoyed reading about the way you parent – simply with old-fashioned ideas. it is the way i was raised and my husband and i strive every day to instill the same values in our son. you have inspired me as a woman and as a mother. and while this post began as a refreshing reminder, it soon broke my heart. i appreciate your values and i understand that this is your forum, but i am sure you know that you alienated some readers with your position on abortion. of course, it is presumed that people who practice catholism are pro-life, but what surprised me was the words you chose…"kill", "murder". isn't there a more delicate way of asserting your beliefs? one that may take into consideration that a woman reading this post may be sitting at her kitchen table, nursing her baby, and suddenly finds herself bombarded with painful memories of being sexually assaulted, subsequently impregnated and scheduling an abortion…? i am not here to begin an argument. and i still respect you as a brave blogger and as a mother who is simply trying to teach her children what she believes is right. i jut thought that i too would be brave and would offer another side to the story. although i am a bit sad disheartened, i accept that this blog is your space, that we are all entitled to our opintions, and i remain a faithful reader, sarah."
Beautifully written and well said. I will save this for when my own children are old enough to understand it. And hopefully I can teach them in the meantime so that it's all things they have heard many times before. You are a terrific mom and you are so inspiring to me. I hope to someday have even a small measure of the wisdom you possess.
That's what happens when you stand your ground in God's word. People of the world don't like you anymore and think you are "judgemental". Good for you Sarah! There are TONS of us who agree with you 100%!
I too loved this post and on the whole, commend you for writing it. However I must agree with Staci that sometimes things int work out the way we plan. Sometimes your husband, the father of your children chooses to walk away not just from his wife, but his faith, his commitments and his innocent children (which should be obvious by now, happened to me). I was happy that I had finished my career, lthough my husband had discouraged me from completing my degreebecause we strongly agreed on my being a SAHM. It was this career that helped me pay for my kids Catholic school education, and launch them to adulthood. Based on this experience I chose to raise both my children to have careers and be safe reliant. My children are now adults, and I am now a grandmother, and very proud of the son and daughter I raised.
Many thanks for posting these thoughts for your fans to read and pass on to their loved ones. There is nothing wrong with telling your children..No. So many people now days can't do it. I remember misbehaving at my grandparents home and was reprimanded immediately by my grandfather…I never disrespected him again. Of course I was brought up in the generation where children were seen but not heard and I don't think that would be what we want today…but No you can't go…No you can't have it…No that is not the way we treat our fellow man. Maybe there wouldn't be such horrendous headlines in the papers. God Bless you and your family.
Best thing I have read in a long time, way to tell it how it is. The world is an evil place, I love that there are still people out there who are firm in their values and what is right regardless of what the world says.
I have read your blog for several years and usually look forward to the stories and wisdom you have to share. However, in the last few months I have felt a little stung after 2 posts relating to working mothers. I teach school, and while there is probably a way we could make it work, it would more than likely mean my husband would leave his family business. Yes, I would prefer to stay home, but in no way do I feel that I am doing my children a disservice by working. Like your children, mine come first as well. They are not being "raised in a pack with strangers." They are in a wonderful in-home daycare and could not be more loved or attended to. My husband and I are the ones raising them. Surely you don't think you stop raising yours when they go off to school for the same amount of time mine are out of the house. I often wonder if the people on the "mothers shouldn't work" bandwagon stop and think about what that would mean. In my elementary school, we'd have two teachers if mothers didn't work. Let's cheer on all mothers who are doing what they need to do and doing it to the best of their ability. What's best for one is not always best for all.
I completely agree. The posts lately essentially bashing working mothers has been quite hurtful. Shouldn't mothers help each other and build each other up? Does a working father (your husband, Sarah, for example) love his children any less because he works? Of course not.
What a wonderful, heart felt letter. I am saving it, to write my own to my two teenage girls. There is so much in this world that we just put up with and become numb to…I dont want this for my children. Thank you.
Wow! Powerfully said. So important to teach our children the rules and not the exceptions. Of course we know that sometimes our girls may have to work due to unforeseen circumstances, or our children may have children out of wedlock, or any number of things that isn't what we hoped for them but we, as parents, should still teach the ideal. Thank you for your thoughts and thank you for taking a stand. What a wonderful woman you are–thank you for taking the time to write.
I feel the same way, except I belong to the church of Jesus Christ of latter-day saints, my husband was raised an active catholic and I very much respect your beliefs, they are very similar to my own. How I wish young people could gaze into their future just a few years out then live their lives with that bigger perspective. The important things are truly the small sacred things close to our hearts. Amen to all you've said. Well done.
Thank you so much for this post! I recently purchased a book called "Praying the Scriptures for your Children" by Jodie Berndt. It has helped me so much in learning how to pray for my little girl. This is definitely a tough world to grow up in.
Abbie
As a Catholic mom of three, I couldn't agree more with what you wrote. This is one of your best posts and why I come back daily. Thank you for writing the truth.
And how in the world is it that you don't have a book deal? Do you?
I agree with like 99% of what you said. Excellent! I think I need to write a letter to my kids.
We really do need to let them know what normal used to be. I am shocked when I hear what was normal in our grandparents lives! It's a good reality check.
There is 1 thing that I wish was different about your article. My heart breaks at how you call people who are made in the image of God jerks,people who should be looked down on. My heart goes out to people who are in the Hollywood industry, and to makers of porn. They are out there looking for that void in their life that only Jesus Christ can fill through a personal love relationship with Him (only once a person has experienced this can one know how incredibly healing and powerful this is!! Ask me how I know) — we need to instill in our children a LOVE for the worst of mankind. That is what Jesus did when he came to earth. . . . We need to live our lives in such a way that they are drawn by our love to the love of our Heavenly Father who can heal the deepest soul wounds that they have.
Excellent post! I am so glad you wrote it and had the courage to publish it. Thank you! I often joke to my husband that I wish I could live next door to you, but I would probably drive you crazy following you around asking you questions! I want to be like you when I grow up! (I'm 31) 🙂
Love your blog, but am also sick of all the SAHM's waving their flag of doing the 'noble and right' thing by staying at home. Can you imagine the backlash that we working moms would get if we said were were showing our girls that they really could be anything they wanted, even if that's a CEO, teacher, doctor, lawyer… All three of my children have gone to daycare, so I guess they are in a pack being raised by strangers… amazingly all have turned out wonderfully and don't freak out in elementary school like so many of the non-daycare kids do. A lot of we moms work because we want to, not because we have to. Many of us work to keep our balance and sanity. Every SAHM I know these days spends all her time working out at the gym, shopping for the latest fashions, or tapping away on her iPhone while her kids are ignored anyway…
Hang. Off. Your. Every. Word.
As the Mother of 4, two of them teenaged sons, I will be sitting my kids down tonight & letting them have a read. Brave words. Real words. And I feel exactly the same way about Australia, I love my country more than anything, but I loathe the way we are losing good wholesome family values.
Well done, Sarah. Niki x
Being catholic means they know how to pick themselves up when they make a wrong choice. When they fail at trying to live the life they are expected to.
Thank you Sarah. I have missed your mom advice so much -you've been so busy since Janey (as it should be!) and the posts have been short and light. This was exactly what I needed to read although my daughter is not yet 3 and baby on the way. Teaching my values and virtues is a daily struggle -is she learning; does she hear me; is she disrespecting already!? I know the struggles will only get bigger and I hope and pray that I can raise my family to be nice, responsible and respectful. I'm only a decade older than Isaac and can absolutely say -your mom is right. So right. I wish my upbringing was more like your family!
I love you! I'm proud to follow your blog. This post encourages me, that we' not the only parents who are teaching right & wrong, of good & evil and who reject the Lukewarm-ness that is so prevalent among all Christian demominations. Thank you.
thank you so much for sharing truths with us and with your children. they are eternal truths-they don't change. thank you for not mingling these truths with drivel and language of the world like "find yourself" or "live your dreams" or "there might be exceptions" or the like. it is that kind of talk that confuses our kids. they need daily & direct doses of truth. i admire you so, so much. well done.
You know that saying, "he's like my brother by another mother!" You are like my sister by another mother. Every single thing you wrote is exactly what I have been drilling into my kids and will continue to do so (right down to the Catholic part!). I agree with it all. Our culture has degraded so much and sometimes I just want to despair, but God always wins out in the end. I always think of the phrase from the Book of Esther–who knows but that you have been brought to your position for such a time as this? God needs us to fight the good fight. Go down fighting! 🙂
Unfortunately two-income families are up against as many stereotypes as one-income/stay-at-home-mom families once were. Parents have two-incomes for a whole mess-load of reasons other than being materialistic or wanting and having it all. I will teach both my daughter and son that either is very noble and I would never want them to feel less like a woman or man in a two-income family. Children are at risk, not in the one-or-two-income families that bicker between themselves, but in many (not all) of the non-working/welfare families that teach that it is okay to take a handout and not contribute to society or their own children's upbringings. What truly counts are the values you instill in them and that they pass on to their children. We parents can't foresee their world or their situation in 20 years. But I'll rest confidently knowing that, whatever decision they make, it was based upon the right values.
Anyone who has the courage to speak out like this gets attacked, and that is sad. I think it's fabulous that you did, and that you hold strong to your righteous values. The world needs more decent people to speak up and act, just as much as society and media do about the opposite.
Thank you for having the courage, decency, and moral conviction to post/teach these things to your children.
This should be required reading for everyone, not just parents. I too was raised in a world that is very different from today. I am a single woman, very career oriented, self-sufficient….but…I would like to see our daughters value their own bodies, protect themselves…and I would love to see our boys grow up to be "men"…men who respect women, honor them and cherish them. I love what you said…stick to your guns…we need more mothers like you.
This was beautiful and so true. You are instructing your children on how to live and forming their values. I don't think anyone should be offended – these are your values, and most of them used to be the values of our country.
Being a SAHM mom is a sacrifice, and anyone who has read your blog for a while should realize that you did other things to help your family finances in your early days of marriage. We must all do what we think best for our family.
I appreciate your blog. My boys are mostly grown, and I am becoming so sad and alarmed at how materialistic and needy our country is becoming. There used to be pride in working and saving for what you could afford, not complaining that the government should provide it for us.
Amen! The world needs more mothers just like you standing for all that is good and just. I feel the same way and want my children to not be afraid to stand for what is right, not some politically correct mumbo jumbo. Thanks Sarah!
Wow Sarah! So interesting. I disagree with you on some points but I love how upfront you are. I think I may write my own letter to my kids. Thanks 😉
Sarah, I don't think I have said lately how much I love you! We have to teach this every day 🙂
I love this. I had my kids read it. We need more voices for them to hear– the world is so loud. Thanks!
Thank you for this.
Loved this. Thanks for being honest enough to risk putting this out there in blog world. I especially loved the part about your boys and sex. I think so often we tell our girls about the dangers of pregnancy but not our guys. You brought up excellent points. I may save this for my kids!
Thank you for speaking the TRUTH. I'm a very new mama, and I oftentimes get so overwhelmed thinking about what my baby (and other children I will hopefully have) will face in this lifetime and it scares me. The world has changed so much, in even my lifetime. So many people feel entitled in our country, and the fabrics of our country and of our selves is shifting. You nailed it perfectly. Your words are beautiful. I especially love your words to your daughters…as a woman (and a daughter), I know what you say to your daughters is so true, but sometimes I feel that others devalue what I'm doing (raising my baby full-time) and think I'm throwing my life away. Thank you thank you THANK YOU for your poignant thoughts, and thank you for living truth out loud.
Very powerful Sarah! Thank you!
I. LOVE. This. LOVE this. I have been reading your blog for something like… many, many years (at least since Patrick was a newborn!). This is THE best post I've read by you (and I have read EVERY single post– I stayed up late one night when the hubs was out of town and read ALL of your older posts), and that's saying something, since I agree with 99.99% of what you say, all the time. 🙂
Your children and your hubby are so lucky to have you. Thanks for inspiring so many moms!!! And thanks for taking a stand, when the world continues to silence voices like ours.
Love this! The only part I can't relate to is being catholic, but you have so many wonderful points in this letter. It's so sad to think about the world our children are growing up in. Right now, my kids are small, and I can keep them insulated to some degree, but that is changing quickly as they begin school and are out in the world more (and they are in a Christian school). I always love reading your blog- your experiences in motherhood are always spot on and offer so much encouragement! Thank you for this post, you said everything that children these days NEED to hear!
Lovely. Compassionate. Truth. Well said.
Thanks for posting. This is good stuff.
Agree agree agree!!! Our country has forgotten about old-fashioned hard work and sacrifice…I'm usually the opinionated one spouting off whether people want to hear it or not…refreshing to hear your standpoint!
Well said. Well said!! We need more Moms like you! While I am not a Catholic, I can relate to you as a mom. Your way of thinking is so refreshing and encouraging! And I love your blog and recommend it to overwhelmed mothers I meet along the way.
~Starla
LOVE this! And thank you. My oldest is 5 and I often find myself wondering how my generation has gotten so many things wrong. What will their future look like? I think there are a lot of smaller voices who agree that just get overshadowed by the bigger ones. Thank you for willing to post something you believe and not apologize for it.
This is so wonderful! Thank you for posting.
Absolutely loved this! I even just now read some of it out loud to my daughter who walked into the room and we are both cheering you on. I am a foster mom and I see firsthand the heartache of living the opposite of this. One of our foster baby's mommas would keep asking and asking my oldest (unmarried) daughter when she was going to have a baby. It finally stopped when my daughter just said, "I am not married." It seemed so novel to the mom!
I do admit, I did laugh out loud when you described what was on the side of the you tube screen. It is an awful thing to see, but your honest description made me glad I hadn't taken a sip of coffee!
Love your blog and your insight. Thank you for sharing!
~Karen
I rarely comment, but this letter is the most glorious thing you've written and I would be amiss to not thank you for it. I agree whole-heartedly.
Sarah, that is absolutely brilliant & beautiful. It echoes so much of what we are trying to teach our boys. We continue on, even though I fear it just won't matter before they truly reach adulthood.
I love our country too, and we are teaching love of country, but it truly makes me sad to see what our country is rapidly turning into.
xo
Sarah,
As a Mormon living in your same town I am so thankful for good parents like you who are raising good children. I am so thankful for the strong Catholic influence in our town and for our shared beliefs on raising children, sex, budgeting, and God. Thank you for not making excuses for your beliefs but for sharing them proudly. It makes it easier for me to have good moms around.
Amen Sarah! We need to be saying this to our kids. We need to be the examples. We need to lead….
That comment above – that makes my blood boil! It's judgemental and rude. I have read plenty of posts where you talk about church. And to call your daughter a goody-goody….ack…I have to bite my tongue or you will moderate me right out of the comments.
I love this and plan on reading it to my two oldest. You hit the nail on the head. I love the part where you tell them to be proud of being Catholic. We live in a small town where we have only the one Catholic Church and we are surrounded by many, many non Catholics and my kids have been told terrible things about thier faith by people who are normally "God fearing" folks who just don't understand. I taught our confirmation class last year and we did a whole class on how to respond to the very bad things said to them for their faith. I was shocked at the things they have had to listen to. Thank you for sharing this with us.
Blessings to you
Sarah,.I am so proud of you for writing this and being bold in your beliefs…I am not a Catholic, but I am a Christian~I have to say, so many people not only deny the Holy Spirit but totally ignore the vices of Satan, and the influence and lies he spreads… Hollywood IS a place that is pushing things at our kids faster than we can sometimes block from them…We are in crazy, dark days~Jesus is the only Light and I wonder how people who deny Him can raise their kids alone in this world…thanks for posting if for nothing else than helping this Mom (&dad) know we are not the only people outside our area who feel like this…somedays you feel like it's just you and the people you worship with…that outside of that the whole world thinks you are crazy. This has been a great boost for me today..Be Blessed and Carry on Sister!!!
Wow. Loved this and would love to give a copy to each of our children. I haven't ever commented before, but love to read your blog and appreciate your insight. We belong to different religions, but I love for my children to see that there are many good people in the world who live and believe in the same values as we do. Sometimes I think we forget how many people are still quietly living good, honorable lives because all the "yuck" speaks so much louder. Thank you for making a stand.
Thank you for always giving me the courage and stand up for what I believe when it comes to my kids.
Amen, girlfriend, amen!
This was an awesome post. I am printing this and putting it away to share with my children someday (too young now). You've so eloquently put a lot of the things that my husband and I discuss on a daily basis. How have we come so far from what we once stood for? How can people look at what are society is today and say that it is ok? We, too, are proudly raising our children as Catholics, despite the ridicule we hear directed towards our church daily. Thank you for having the courage to stand up and say everything you have said in a public forum.
I really like how blunt you are, and that you had the courage to point out a lot of the "hidden" crap in our culture. Sometimes it can all be so very overwhelming. May I make one tiny point? In the first paragraph to your boys–which I love–you wrote 'rely on yourself'. Perhaps also remind them to rely on God even more? Goodness knows parenting and working and just living is much too tough on our own. (On the other hand, this is your blog, not mine so if you ignore me that's ok:)
Sarah,
I love your blog! You are an example of a Godly, loving mother and it is so refreshing.
Everything you said in this letter is spot on. I will have my teens read this….
America has forgot its manners and respect I am afraid.
Good job!
And keep the great parenting coming…
Blessings to you and your sweet family!
Preach it sister! I'm not Catholic but Lutheran and I fear what will happen to my children's faith when they are grown. I also feel like I'm the only parent who is trying so hard to teach my kids good morals and manners. So glad I'm not alone. Thank you for sharing this.
Your kids are so blessed to have you for a mom.
Yes!!! Thanks.
So well said!! I check your blog each day and this is the first time I have commented. i have 2 boys 17 and 20. I am going to print this out and let them read it. I feel we have raised them well but I love to have them read things that open a dialogue.
Spoken from the heart and really terrific. Thanks!
this is all so very true. i appreciate your honesty and morals. you are very inspiring. thank you for sharing!
I think I'm about the same age as your oldest child- I found this so interesting, as someone who has also been raised catholic, I think everyone has to make their own way, and decide what's right for them, I think even if you are catholic, maybe you do have to pick and choose what you believe, for me anyway…it's all a bit confusing sometimes but I like that you just spoke your mind here.
I love this. Thank you!
I have never commented in the year I have been reading your blog, but this post deserves a comment. Thank you for being willing to call it as you see it and to speak out in defense of good old fashioned moral living. Our children need to hear more voices like this.
Wow! Amazing and so necessary. I expect you'll receive lots of controversial comments about this because it was bold. But if we aren't bold as parents raising our children, someone else will be. This is amazing, inspired, and brave. I hope you print it out for each of your children to keep with them forever. They will certainly have many occasions to take it out and read it over and over, I'm sure. Thanks for being bold not only with your children, but with all of us, too.
Ditto! Very well said. You are a fantastic Mom and a wonderful role model. Thank you for taking the time to share this 🙂
Couldn't have said it better myself. Thankyou.
You are the perfect example of Courageous Parenting. I admire you and respect you for this wise council. You are one who acts upon the guidance and inspiration you receive from our Heavenly Father. Thank you for sharing this Sarah. You have inspired me to do better in this area. Mothers do have great divine power.
Here are two of my favorite talks I heard given at a world wide conference on this very subject.
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2007/10/mothers-who-know?lang=eng
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2010/10/courageous-parenting?lang=eng
Amen to all of it! Loved this! Thank you!
Amen and amen!
Amen Sarah! Thank you for being so courageous and being a voice of morality in this ever increasingly wicked world. You are wonderful!
You have said it ALL! Brava!!!!! Actually, this made me cry because I feel the same way and try not to let it overwhelm me on most days. It is reassuring to this mama of 7 to know that there are parents out there who are trying to still guide their kids correctly in their Faith and everyday lives. Bless you, Sarah.
Thank you. I sent this to my teenage daughter to read. I told her we didn't have to discuss it, but she MUST read it. Everything you said is what I want to say to my kids, if they would ever listen. I have to make them listen.
I love this SOOO much! I agree with everything you wrote, with the substitution of my own religion in the place of yours. =)
Thank you so very much for posting this. We all need more support in making good choices and saying no to things that will always be bad, no matter how many people say it's right.
Great to read this today. I am also Catholic, and agree with every single thing you wrote. It was brave, and I applaud you for having the courage to post it.
May God give you the grace you need to deal with the comments that are bound to come your way that we readers won't ever know about.
Excellent post, Sarah! Excellent, excellent! My friend and i were just talking this morning about reality TV and the trash that is on. I know TWO young girls in their twenties who are unmarried and having babies and it scares me to raise my girls in this world. Thank you for this.
I believe the holy Spirit was with you in this moment! …praise god!…we need more moms like you your kids are so lucky to have you..its so so true old fashioned morals are going out the window…
Love this. All of it. Hooray for the power of strong and righteous women!
Love, love, love this motherly wisdom. Very well written and much needed admonishment for this next generation we're rearing. I so love your blog. Thank you for sharing this with those of us who cannot articulate as well!! I've passed this on for my son to read.
as a new mother and as someone who has read your blog for a long time, i have felt so at home and cozy in your blog. and i am always left feeling empowered and have so enjoyed reading about the way you parent – simply with old-fashioned ideas. it is the way i was raised and my husband and i strive every day to instill the same values in our son. you have inspired me as a woman and as a mother. and while this post began as a refreshing reminder, it soon broke my heart. i appreciate your values and i understand that this is your forum, but i am sure you know that you alienated some readers with your position on abortion. of course, it is presumed that people who practice catholism are pro-life, but what surprised me was the words you chose…"kill", "murder". isn't there a more delicate way of asserting your beliefs? one that may take into consideration that a woman reading this post may be sitting at her kitchen table, nursing her baby, and suddenly finds herself bombarded with painful memories of being sexually assaulted, subsequently impregnated and scheduling an abortion…? i am not here to begin an argument. and i still respect you as a brave blogger and as a mother who is simply trying to teach her children what she believes is right. i jut thought that i too would be brave and would offer another side to the story. although i am a bit sad disheartened, i accept that this blog is your space, that we are all entitled to our opintions, and i remain a faithful reader, sarah.
AMEN!!!!!!!!!! Love this so much I am sharing on FB!
I enjoyed reading this post and you raised so many valuable points. I commend you. I really treasure some of the traditions and beliefs you outlined but wish you had a more open mind. Not everything is as black and white as you describe. Reading it I wondered if you also consider gay and lesbian people sinners? I surely hope not. I hope for my children so be more inclusive than the generation I am part of today. Thanks for posting this and developing a forum where people can engage in some of these important conversations.
Sarah, you are a great mom!
What a beautiful, truth-filled letter!!
Thank you for those beautiful, heart-felt words. I feel the same way but you said it so eloquently. Your children are blessed to have you for their mother.
I agree with you 100%, Sarah. These values come through in your posts and are the reason you are one of my favorites. To someone looking in at MY life, I think the expectation might be that my opinion would be quite different, but I think I am a living example of parents not preaching this truth. I am divorced; I made a poor choice and now I live with the repercussions. Every day is also a chance to live more in line with what I know to be right, though. So, thank you for writing Truth.
Thank you for your post today….I am new mom to two older children…and I feel I have to undo wht their lives was before us and build into them morals; at the same time bonding with them teach them to trust,and love us. I think that if you build it they will follow…..my parents were strict and I was curious but in the end I ended up marrying my one true and first love, and to my last days I follow discretion,kindness,accountability ….and I question my own integrity always ….I hope to be my children's example and that everything I sat and each them they will also follow.
Thank you,
I'm not of your faith but I share many of your beliefs and celebrate our Chrisitian similarities. I LOVE your priorities, and I love this letter. It feels so empowering to know somebody out there is teaching abstinence til marriage and self control in all aspects of life. God bless you and your family.
perfectly said. thank you.
Although I disagree with you in some of your points, I think the letter is a great way to express your feelings about how you raise your children and all the turmoil in this world we live in today.
The only thing I disagree with you on *holding up my hands to cover from all the backlash* is that I won't raise my daughter to depend on anyone…specifically a man. I'm going to go out on a limb and assume you've never had a man whom who've depended on walk out of your life and not look back…even when you NEVER thought he had a bone in his body capable of deserting his family.
I personally will not raise my daughter to believe that her only place is in the home raising babies her whole life. Could it be a PART of her life? Sure HUGE part? Sure! But not exclusively. If she's blessed enough to be able to stay home, wonderful.
But I also want her raised to know that should that "oh so wonderful man" up and walk out on her and those children, that she can pick herself up off the floor and raise her children herself, without the need for everyone to feel sorry for her and sit around and mope because some man she gave up everything for backed out on "the deal".
She chooses to have those children just as much as he did…and I personally don't want her to expect any man to be any more financially responsible for those children than she is. I've seen WAY too many women hurt by the "big bad mean ole' husband" who went out and met the "oh so hot" secretary or even decided that their wife "just wasn't doin' it for them anymore". Is he an ass? Sure. But it happens, and I don't want my daughter to feel she's a victim in that situation. I want her to hold her chin high and say "I can do this on my own." And mean it.
Just my opinion of course on that subject, but I'm RIGHT there with you on the rest. Thank you for this post, I love reading your writing. 🙂
Sarah, I'm with you on so many points…..Staci, also, has very valid advice…….hats off to both of you!! (I'm at the stage of watching my grandchildren grow……it was always a challenge to be a parent but I have to say the obstacles are ten-fold now.)
Amen! I need to hear this again and again as much as my kiddos do 🙂
Thank you for writing this! As a Catholic woman, married and raising 3 young children, I agree and appreciate every word you wrote! I admire and look up to you- you are a shining example for us rookie, Catholic mothers, attempting to raise up a new generation to be unspoiled by the world. Many blessings to your family!
Thank you. I'm sharing this, if you don't mind.
Oh, how I love this post. I wish every person in the world was raised with such wonderful values. Our world would surely be a different place. I look up to you so much Sarah!
Wonderful post. I'll be saving this for my children! Your family is such a breath of fresh air.
That was absolutely lovely, thank you.
Thank you for not being afraid to pour out your heart, especially during Lent. As a fellow Catholic and momma of three young boys I too worry about the future of our country and world. It is all changing so fast. I agree with you in every point and hope that more people continue to hold fast to the truth and to their faith! God bless you!
Amen and Amen. I agree. My heart aches with what is presented int he world as normal and okay. I struggle with ways to explain and show my children what is right and good in the eyes of God when the world tells them that if we practice what God says is right and good, we are being evil and judgemental. God bless you and your honest spirit!
Well said! You verbalized all the thoughts in my head! It was wonderful to read and something I want to share with my children.
I rarely comment but my thoughts match almost entirely. As a Catholic mama, are there books that have helped guide you? I find myself in circles with Catholics turned Christian–who bad mouth or question my practices. I need resources that help me stand strong and firm in my Catholic faith.
Absolutely articulate and amazing!
Several of your points have been hot topics in our house this week with Jackson! This is a great example of what the blog world has done for me….glean from extraordinary mothers, like yourself and feel I'm not alone in teaching values to my children in a morally declining world.
Keep it up! You are doing so much good.
If I could stand up and applaud you right now, I would. Thank you for writing this and for passing on to your children the kind of morals and principals this world needs more of. I love your blog!
Way to go, Sarah! I love your motherly wisdom. I had to explain abortion to my 11 yr. old daughter a while ago – and she COULD NOT BELIEVE people would do that to their unborn babies.
I am not Catholic, but as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints I could have written this whole thing. These are my exact feelings about the world my kids are facing. Thank you for being a consistently bold force for GOOD!
Beautifully, lovingly stated! I LOVE this idea and think I will write a letter to my grandchildren. The world has gotten SO far away from good old fashioned values and as mothers, it's our responsibility to teach them to our children. You're a brave, strong, righteous woman and personally, I find it refreshing to see someone stand up for what they believe!! Bravo!!
~Mary
Thank you for being such a wonderful and inspirational mother! It is comforting to hear you voice the same words of warning and wisdom I believe!
Brilliant, absolutely brilliant!!! You have put into words much of what I've been struggling to say.
Bravo!! I hope you don't mind me printing this off and sharing it with my kids someday. I agree with you 100% and I feel so old fashioned! Thanks for your example.
Thank you for sharing your letter to your children with us. I shared it with my own daughter as there were so many things I have wanted to say to her but couldn't verbalize. Thank you.
Amen. A. MEN!
Love love love this post!
I love this post Sarah and will definitely make sure my husband and two children read it. I have read through some of the comments and don't feel that you need to be Catholic to agree, or disagree, with the message. I was raised Catholic and still have strong Catholic values; however, I left the structured Catholic church for a smaller Catholic-based church(not associated with the Boston Archdiocese). The message is the same and yet the guilt is less. Our children are some of the youngest (11 & 14) who attend and they get the message –which is quite similar to yours. My husband and I have wonderful families and quote our parents and grandparents often. As my college professor said "you would not be a good person if your parents weren't good people"!!
This one post sums up why if I had to choose just one blog to read for the rest of my days, it would be yours.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
And for anyone reading Sarah's touching words about healing after an abortion, I highly recommend visiting hopeafterabortion.org and abortionchangesyou.org.
Thank you for speaking the Truth so beautifully. I will be sharing this.
What a great post and letter to your children. I am not Catholic, but am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons), and completely agree with you. It's wonderful to see in such a crazy world with so much filth that there are women like me that are trying to keep filth out and instead fill our homes with all good things from God.
I have read your blog for a few years now, and haven't commented before though many times I wanted to say Amen! I love the honesty and straightforwardness that you are raising your children with. This post is brilliant. As a fellow Catholic, I know how hard it is to raise children with values and morals when they are being bombarded by the world all the time. I will definitely be sharing this letter with my 3 daughters. I'm sure you have probably gotten some not so nice comments, ignore them, and keep letting the Holy Spirit guide you. God Bless you and your wonderful family!
Hi Sarah,
I have never commented before but I thought this letter captured how I have been feeling with my own kids. Although I'm not Catholic, I am a Christian and I feel that so many more of us, mothers, fathers, adults in general need to hear more if this truth. There are days when I feel, as a mother, that I am swimming against the tide and it becomes stressful or I just want to cave BUT it is so helpful to hear that there are still parents who feel the way I do. Thank you so much for this and know that it was such an encouragement to so many!
this is why i love your blog. this is wonderful:)
Thankyou for being breve enough to write this. I'm british and protestant bu agree with the whole sentiment. I'll go to bed tonight feeeling a little les alone in my mission to bring my kids up right. Thankyou!
Thankyou for being breve enough to write this. I'm british and protestant bu agree with the whole sentiment. I'll go to bed tonight feeeling a little les alone in my mission to bring my kids up right. Thankyou!
Thankyou for being breve enough to write this. I'm british and protestant bu agree with the whole sentiment. I'll go to bed tonight feeeling a little les alone in my mission to bring my kids up right. Thankyou!
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I have been feeling so overwhelmed lately by what is going on in our country and our culture. I agree 100% with everything you said. We need to all stand up for what we believe in and stop the moral relativism that is invading our country. Thank you for having the courage to say what you believe. You are my hero today 🙂
thank you for such a beautiful and BOLD post! i love how unapologetic you are in sharing your beliefs. especially when many of them are "hot topics" and many in our society would claim your values and beliefs are old fashioned. but they are not! those values are still relevant today and so, so very needed. thank you for your wonderful example and courageous mothering!
love it! thank you!
I have but one rule for my kids: Never do anything that wouldn't make your mother proud.
Pretty much sums it up.
Your children are so blessed to have your words!
Also, regarding the comment that we should use kindler, gentler terms than "kill" and "murder" for abortion – I believe we NEED to use terms like that so that young girls who believe they're just "removing a blob of cells" know it's really a BABY and that yes, they are paying someone to kill it.
I love every word of this post! I needed to hear it too. Thank you so much for sharing!!
Thank you, this is why you are my favorite blogger! I agree 100%. Thank you for having the courage to address these issues on your blog!
Hi Sarah, Thanks for this post. I found it so reassuring. I'm not Catholic (I am Muslim) but identify with SO many of the things you talk about. It's really comforting to hear from someone else who has much more experience raising children (mine are only 6 and 3 yrs old). Best wishes, Maryam
Sarah…keep letting your light shine! What a wonderful letter for your children (I am going to share it with mine!) and so REFRESHING to hear! I love it! You are a gift to your children and to all those around you. It is great to know that we have a sisterhood of mothers from different backgrounds and faiths that value hard work, thrift, and moral values. GIves me hope for the future! YAHOO! AMEN!
What a beautiful letter of TRUTH. I couldn't agree with you more. Sarah, {and I mean this in the most non-cheesy way} you have been such an inspiration as I mother my children. Each topic you address I find myself nodding in agreement and wondering aloud why there aren't more of us with common sense and logic out there.
We're expecting our fourth {a little girl after three boys!} and I often wonder what sort of world our children will grow up in. But you reminded me yet again why we go to such great lengths to protect and teach our children the hard truths of this world. Thank you for such an encouraging letter!
Love, love, love, love, love this post, Sarah. As always. And thank you for calling abortion what it is. The taking of a life at any other stage = murder. I'm always amazed how people lie to themselves and try to say that the killing of a baby in the womb is not.
God bless you … and thank you for Clover Lane! xo
AMEN!!! You are awesome!!!
Be prepared for this to go VIRAL. I'm not kidding. Just be ready to say "Yes" or "No" to morning talk shows, CNN, whatever. You have struck a chord which usually happens when someone writes something brave and honest and true.
This is wonderful! Thank you for standing up for good morals and standards! How much we all need to be reminded of these things often now days. You are a wonderful Mom! By the way, my youngest and your Janey were born on the same day.
I am not catholic, but I 100% agree with you and I RESPECT you for publicly saying these things!! So true, so important and so brave!! These are the things I will tell my children as they grow up, and I love your example in how to say it – thank you!
Thank you, Sarah! As a fellow Catholic mom myself, your steadfast words are music to my ears. I agree 100% with your whole letter, and I am so grateful for your blog. We have to keep fighting this evil in the world for our children's sake. Just delete the inevitable nasty, ignorant, in denial, and rationalizing comments you will surely also receive from your honest words. Keep fighting the good fight!
Perfection!
Can I print this and sign my name???
Thank you–it's so on!
Sandy toes
STANDING OVATION | bravo | love
thank you. i whole heartedly agree!!! how can we harness the power of like-minded moms to influence popular culture????? i love this letter and will share it with my children…
From across the Atlantic Ocean I applaude . As a Catholic mom of four , from the other side of the world . Living in a mostly Catholic country but only a few churches are full on Sundays because people values aren't what they used to be. They rather go shopping and not go to mass on Sundays. It saddens me.
My country is full of lovely and old Catholic Churches that are empty. But I applaude you for your letter to your children and I am going to show it to my two oldest .
I apologize for any errors in my English . I'm not a native speaker, although I can read English the writing part is very rusty…
Thank you again for your letter
Rita
While I agree with so many parts of the post, I also whole heartedly agree with Lauren's comment. As I continued to read this morning I felt so sad. Sad for those where life is not always black and white, decisions are painful and that I could not possibly know the pain another woman might be going through because I haven't been in anybody's shoes but my own. So many good things that us parents must teach & hopefully guide our children through the craziness so that they won't ever face those situations…or hopefully make the right choice. And unfortunately, there are so many bad parents are out there too who don't care like you and your readers. As always, thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Love & compassion…
Lauren…
"as a new mother and as someone who has read your blog for a long time, i have felt so at home and cozy in your blog. and i am always left feeling empowered and have so enjoyed reading about the way you parent – simply with old-fashioned ideas. it is the way i was raised and my husband and i strive every day to instill the same values in our son. you have inspired me as a woman and as a mother. and while this post began as a refreshing reminder, it soon broke my heart. i appreciate your values and i understand that this is your forum, but i am sure you know that you alienated some readers with your position on abortion. of course, it is presumed that people who practice catholism are pro-life, but what surprised me was the words you chose…"kill", "murder". isn't there a more delicate way of asserting your beliefs? one that may take into consideration that a woman reading this post may be sitting at her kitchen table, nursing her baby, and suddenly finds herself bombarded with painful memories of being sexually assaulted, subsequently impregnated and scheduling an abortion…? i am not here to begin an argument. and i still respect you as a brave blogger and as a mother who is simply trying to teach her children what she believes is right. i jut thought that i too would be brave and would offer another side to the story. although i am a bit sad disheartened, i accept that this blog is your space, that we are all entitled to our opintions, and i remain a faithful reader, sarah."
Beautifully written and well said. I will save this for when my own children are old enough to understand it. And hopefully I can teach them in the meantime so that it's all things they have heard many times before. You are a terrific mom and you are so inspiring to me. I hope to someday have even a small measure of the wisdom you possess.
One of the most judgmental things I've read in a long time. I can't imagine raising children with such fear in their hearts.
This is definitely one blog I'll be unsubscribing to.
Yes these days if one states their opinion and stands up for morality they are judgemental and intolerant.
That's what happens when you stand your ground in God's word. People of the world don't like you anymore and think you are "judgemental". Good for you Sarah! There are TONS of us who agree with you 100%!
Fabulous piece and beautifully written.
Thank you…You are so right!
Sarah, this was a very brave post. May God Bless you!
I too loved this post and on the whole, commend you for writing it. However I must agree with Staci that sometimes things int work out the way we plan. Sometimes your husband, the father of your children chooses to walk away not just from his wife, but his faith, his commitments and his innocent children (which should be obvious by now, happened to me). I was happy that I had finished my career, lthough my husband had discouraged me from completing my degreebecause we strongly agreed on my being a SAHM. It was this career that helped me pay for my kids Catholic school education, and launch them to adulthood. Based on this experience I chose to raise both my children to have careers and be safe reliant. My children are now adults, and I am now a grandmother, and very proud of the son and daughter I raised.
Many thanks for posting these thoughts for your fans to read and pass on to their loved ones. There is nothing wrong with telling your children..No. So many people now days can't do it. I remember misbehaving at my grandparents home and was reprimanded immediately by my grandfather…I never disrespected him again. Of course I was brought up in the generation where children were seen but not heard and I don't think that would be what we want today…but No you can't go…No you can't have it…No that is not the way we treat our fellow man. Maybe there wouldn't be such horrendous headlines in the papers. God Bless you and your family.
Do you realize that from your home you are possibly changing the world by posting this letter? I really believe that. Thanks for taking the time!
Best thing I have read in a long time, way to tell it how it is. The world is an evil place, I love that there are still people out there who are firm in their values and what is right regardless of what the world says.
Adored every word….
I have read your blog for several years and usually look forward to the stories and wisdom you have to share. However, in the last few months I have felt a little stung after 2 posts relating to working mothers. I teach school, and while there is probably a way we could make it work, it would more than likely mean my husband would leave his family business. Yes, I would prefer to stay home, but in no way do I feel that I am doing my children a disservice by working. Like your children, mine come first as well. They are not being "raised in a pack with strangers." They are in a wonderful in-home daycare and could not be more loved or attended to. My husband and I are the ones raising them. Surely you don't think you stop raising yours when they go off to school for the same amount of time mine are out of the house. I often wonder if the people on the "mothers shouldn't work" bandwagon stop and think about what that would mean. In my elementary school, we'd have two teachers if mothers didn't work. Let's cheer on all mothers who are doing what they need to do and doing it to the best of their ability. What's best for one is not always best for all.
I completely agree. The posts lately essentially bashing working mothers has been quite hurtful. Shouldn't mothers help each other and build each other up? Does a working father (your husband, Sarah, for example) love his children any less because he works? Of course not.
What a wonderful, heart felt letter. I am saving it, to write my own to my two teenage girls. There is so much in this world that we just put up with and become numb to…I dont want this for my children. Thank you.
Wow! Powerfully said. So important to teach our children the rules and not the exceptions. Of course we know that sometimes our girls may have to work due to unforeseen circumstances, or our children may have children out of wedlock, or any number of things that isn't what we hoped for them but we, as parents, should still teach the ideal. Thank you for your thoughts and thank you for taking a stand. What a wonderful woman you are–thank you for taking the time to write.
I feel the same way, except I belong to the church of Jesus Christ of latter-day saints, my husband was raised an active catholic and I very much respect your beliefs, they are very similar to my own. How I wish young people could gaze into their future just a few years out then live their lives with that bigger perspective. The important things are truly the small sacred things close to our hearts. Amen to all you've said. Well done.
Thank you so much for this post! I recently purchased a book called "Praying the Scriptures for your Children" by Jodie Berndt. It has helped me so much in learning how to pray for my little girl. This is definitely a tough world to grow up in.
Abbie
This is awesome. Thank you for putting into words exactly how I feel and exactly what I want my children to know!
As a Catholic mom of three, I couldn't agree more with what you wrote. This is one of your best posts and why I come back daily. Thank you for writing the truth.
And how in the world is it that you don't have a book deal? Do you?
I agree with like 99% of what you said. Excellent! I think I need to write a letter to my kids.
We really do need to let them know what normal used to be. I am shocked when I hear what was normal in our grandparents lives! It's a good reality check.
There is 1 thing that I wish was different about your article. My heart breaks at how you call people who are made in the image of God jerks,people who should be looked down on. My heart goes out to people who are in the Hollywood industry, and to makers of porn. They are out there looking for that void in their life that only Jesus Christ can fill through a personal love relationship with Him (only once a person has experienced this can one know how incredibly healing and powerful this is!! Ask me how I know) — we need to instill in our children a LOVE for the worst of mankind. That is what Jesus did when he came to earth. . . . We need to live our lives in such a way that they are drawn by our love to the love of our Heavenly Father who can heal the deepest soul wounds that they have.
And this is why I look forward to reading your blog…thank you, Sarah!
Excellent post! I am so glad you wrote it and had the courage to publish it. Thank you! I often joke to my husband that I wish I could live next door to you, but I would probably drive you crazy following you around asking you questions! I want to be like you when I grow up! (I'm 31) 🙂
Love your blog, but am also sick of all the SAHM's waving their flag of doing the 'noble and right' thing by staying at home. Can you imagine the backlash that we working moms would get if we said were were showing our girls that they really could be anything they wanted, even if that's a CEO, teacher, doctor, lawyer… All three of my children have gone to daycare, so I guess they are in a pack being raised by strangers… amazingly all have turned out wonderfully and don't freak out in elementary school like so many of the non-daycare kids do. A lot of we moms work because we want to, not because we have to. Many of us work to keep our balance and sanity. Every SAHM I know these days spends all her time working out at the gym, shopping for the latest fashions, or tapping away on her iPhone while her kids are ignored anyway…
Favorite post ever! Make sure your Mom reads this! She will be smiling for days. Keep up the great work and kiss sweet baby Jane!
Your blog is doing good work Sarah!
Hang. Off. Your. Every. Word.
As the Mother of 4, two of them teenaged sons, I will be sitting my kids down tonight & letting them have a read. Brave words. Real words. And I feel exactly the same way about Australia, I love my country more than anything, but I loathe the way we are losing good wholesome family values.
Well done, Sarah. Niki x
Being catholic means they know how to pick themselves up when they make a wrong choice. When they fail at trying to live the life they are expected to.
Thank you Sarah. I have missed your mom advice so much -you've been so busy since Janey (as it should be!) and the posts have been short and light. This was exactly what I needed to read although my daughter is not yet 3 and baby on the way. Teaching my values and virtues is a daily struggle -is she learning; does she hear me; is she disrespecting already!? I know the struggles will only get bigger and I hope and pray that I can raise my family to be nice, responsible and respectful. I'm only a decade older than Isaac and can absolutely say -your mom is right. So right. I wish my upbringing was more like your family!
I love you! I'm proud to follow your blog. This post encourages me, that we' not the only parents who are teaching right & wrong, of good & evil and who reject the Lukewarm-ness that is so prevalent among all Christian demominations. Thank you.
I agree with Debbie, above. Please: less judging, more empathy. There is more than one way to live a satisfying life.
THANKS for writing every word that you wrote.
I could not agree more with Debbie. Congratulations Debbie for bringing some 'real life' to this.
thank you so much for sharing truths with us and with your children. they are eternal truths-they don't change. thank you for not mingling these truths with drivel and language of the world like "find yourself" or "live your dreams" or "there might be exceptions" or the like. it is that kind of talk that confuses our kids. they need daily & direct doses of truth. i admire you so, so much. well done.
You know that saying, "he's like my brother by another mother!" You are like my sister by another mother. Every single thing you wrote is exactly what I have been drilling into my kids and will continue to do so (right down to the Catholic part!). I agree with it all. Our culture has degraded so much and sometimes I just want to despair, but God always wins out in the end. I always think of the phrase from the Book of Esther–who knows but that you have been brought to your position for such a time as this? God needs us to fight the good fight. Go down fighting! 🙂
Unfortunately two-income families are up against as many stereotypes as one-income/stay-at-home-mom families once were. Parents have two-incomes for a whole mess-load of reasons other than being materialistic or wanting and having it all. I will teach both my daughter and son that either is very noble and I would never want them to feel less like a woman or man in a two-income family. Children are at risk, not in the one-or-two-income families that bicker between themselves, but in many (not all) of the non-working/welfare families that teach that it is okay to take a handout and not contribute to society or their own children's upbringings. What truly counts are the values you instill in them and that they pass on to their children. We parents can't foresee their world or their situation in 20 years. But I'll rest confidently knowing that, whatever decision they make, it was based upon the right values.
Brilliant, as truth always is. Printing this one out!
Anyone who has the courage to speak out like this gets attacked, and that is sad. I think it's fabulous that you did, and that you hold strong to your righteous values. The world needs more decent people to speak up and act, just as much as society and media do about the opposite.
Thank you for having the courage, decency, and moral conviction to post/teach these things to your children.
This should be required reading for everyone, not just parents. I too was raised in a world that is very different from today. I am a single woman, very career oriented, self-sufficient….but…I would like to see our daughters value their own bodies, protect themselves…and I would love to see our boys grow up to be "men"…men who respect women, honor them and cherish them. I love what you said…stick to your guns…we need more mothers like you.
This was beautiful and so true. You are instructing your children on how to live and forming their values. I don't think anyone should be offended – these are your values, and most of them used to be the values of our country.
Being a SAHM mom is a sacrifice, and anyone who has read your blog for a while should realize that you did other things to help your family finances in your early days of marriage. We must all do what we think best for our family.
I appreciate your blog. My boys are mostly grown, and I am becoming so sad and alarmed at how materialistic and needy our country is becoming. There used to be pride in working and saving for what you could afford, not complaining that the government should provide it for us.
Amen! The world needs more mothers just like you standing for all that is good and just. I feel the same way and want my children to not be afraid to stand for what is right, not some politically correct mumbo jumbo. Thanks Sarah!