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Home ยป Blog ยป Patrick’s Birthday

Patrick’s Birthday

by Sarah Turner Clover Lane

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This has been a confusing year for Patrick.  He doesn’t “get” the whole Christmas thing yet-between the presents for birthday/Santa bringing them on Christmas Eve and then Jesus’s birthday celebration and HIS birthday celebration-we had some frustrating ‘trying to explain’ moments and I just decided to give up on all the confusion and let him think what he wants and next year he’ll understand more.  He spent a few frustrating moments in tears trying to convince me that Santa was coming the night of his birthday.  It was all too much for him, and I totally get that, because frankly, it was all too much for ME too!

Here’s his Santa classroom visit…on Patrick’s birthday.  He asked for a pair of shorts (basketball shorts is what he means) and a helmet.

On his actual (quiet) birthday:

Jeff and I decided to have a Christmas/birthday family party for him the night before Christmas Eve.  Jeff invited his friend who has a gift for games-he has a whole birthday trivia repertoire where all the guests try to guess Patrick’s answers.  Like “What is Patrick’s favorite food?”  And let me tell you-only a few answers I knew, because you can just never really guess what Patrick is thinking in that little head of his.  He loved being the center of attention.

Abbey was  HUGE help to me that day, decorating and preparing.

The only thing was-I was plumb worn out by Christmas.  I think we have to space it all better next year.  Christmas birthdays are hard aren’t they?  I used to get annoyed when people told me that-I was due on Christmas Eve with Patrick (he came the 20th), but now I am realizing the truth in that statement.  It’s hard to give each its due and still have energy left to enjoy it all.  But I wouldn’t trade him for the world of course, and I remember the year he was born-in the quiet hospital and then a great excuse to be at home on Christmas Day.  It was calm and peaceful and I had a new little baby and what more could I want?

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December 27, 2011 ยท 32 Comments

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  1. Miriam says

    December 27, 2011 at 2:34 pm

    My baby girl also turned 4 this year on December 14th. I struggle with the Christmas birthday thing too. Best approach I've found is to spend her birthday making a big deal about HER, but keeping the presents simple. Like you said, at this age what they want most is your attention. I plan to use birthday money from grandparents to buy her a new bike in the spring.

    From the look on his face, I don't think there's any way he felt "shortchanged!"

    Reply
  2. Kelly says

    December 27, 2011 at 3:02 pm

    I have a daughter, Sara, whose birthday is on Christmas day (just turned 15)and another daughter, Chloe, whose birthday is on the 27th (is turning 13 today). Great planning on my part right?:)

    On Christmas we celebrated Sara's birthday in the morning (before church) and Christmas after. All birthday wrapping and she is happy.
    Now that she is in her teenage years she plans a party with her December friends and has a great time. That has been a blessing for her to feel like her birthdays are separate and special.

    Last summer we had a half surprise birthday for Chloe and that was a hit. So today, I will take her shopping and we will have a quiet celebration for her tonight.

    December birthday are tough. It looks like you have a great handle on it though. Your son is so darling and looks just as happy as ever. He will understand things a little better as he grows.

    Reply
  3. Erika says

    December 27, 2011 at 3:06 pm

    I feel your pain – my daughter turned 2 on the 12/23 and by christmas morning, she's just didn't really care what was under the tree, she wanted to play with her birthday gifts instead. I think next year my husband and i decided to celebrate more of the 1/2 birthday than the actual birthday.

    Reply
  4. valerie says

    December 27, 2011 at 3:11 pm

    Okay…that last picture is priceless Sarah. What a sweet boy.

    Reply
  5. Melissa says

    December 27, 2011 at 3:58 pm

    LOVE the idea about the game where everyone guesses his favorite~stashing that in my brain for future use! Hailey's bday was on the 23rd and Landon's is on the 29th…what were we thinking?! It wears me out, trying to make them special days without mixing it in with Christmas. My favorite Christmas was bringing her home from the hospital ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  6. Meagan Kenney says

    December 27, 2011 at 4:02 pm

    Ugh…I totally understand all of this with Caitlin having her bday on the 22nd. I always try and separate all the celebrations and I am not sure even understands what's going on anyway (like Patrick). We just went for pizza with the grandparents this year, but when we start doing parties I think I will do them in early January.

    Reply
  7. Amanda says

    December 27, 2011 at 4:32 pm

    I'm a Christmas Eve baby. And I truly appreciate all that my mom and family did to make my birth "day" as special even though it was the day before the big Christmas celebration. I never felt slighted or upset my birthday came on Christmas Eve. It's all I ever knew… I got birthday presents AND Christmas presents; in different paper though ๐Ÿ˜€ and all was great. I'm sure Patrick will grow up feeling the same. You'll just have an extra busy December ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  8. EmJay says

    December 27, 2011 at 5:04 pm

    Two of my three children have December birthdays. One on the 13th and one on the 22nd. I did parties for both this year, plus the holiday parties at their school. (That is not going to happen ever again. ) I was completely exhausted on the 23rd, facing a long list of Christmas to dos. I was not exactly in the Christmas spirit this year, after a little tiff with my husband where he rightly called me out on it I kicked it into to gear on the 24th and had a wonderful Christmas. When my first was born on the 13th, we spent his first years waiting to do anything for Christmas until after his birthday. When his sister came along three years later on the 22nd, we gave up on that plan. December is just a huge challenge for us. I work full-time outside our home, but saved vacation to take Fridays off and the week before Christmas off. That helped a lot. Despite, taking the family picture for holiday cards on Halloween and ordering the cards at Thanksgiving, I can report that our holiday cards are all still sitting on my hutch waiting to be sent. Maybe this week. Argh!! I think I'm going to write a note to myself that says it is okay to get some the the December stuff done in November or even October.

    Reply
  9. hc says

    December 27, 2011 at 5:26 pm

    just had baby#3 on the 21st. thanks for the thoughts.

    Reply
  10. Cheryl @ a pretty cool life. says

    December 27, 2011 at 6:04 pm

    My boys' birthdays are Dec. 15 and 19. December is as exhausting as it gets.

    Here's to hibernating all of January! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply
  11. shannon says

    December 27, 2011 at 6:10 pm

    My six yer old was born on Dec 23rd. He is still confused and thinks Santa brings everyone gifts to celebrate his birthday. After all it ends up being 3 days of gifts: birthdday on the 23rd, Christmas eve with extended family on the 24th, and Christmas on the 25th. We have really worked with him to help him understand that Christmas is about Jesus and the birth of Jesus. He is starting to understand better. And I think we may start having his birthday party a few weeks early just to space things. I agree it is exhausting…but fun!

    Reply
  12. the good life mama says

    December 27, 2011 at 6:26 pm

    Our second boy, Henry, was 5 on the 21st. We had his friends party a couple of weeks before and then a special "just family" dinner the night of his birthday. Some years it's at a restaurant of his choice, very exciting for him and easy for me! Last year he thought there was a parade in his honor as the wait staff sang to him. I also like the idea of the 1/2 birthday, but at this point we just try really hard to keep focused and not become overwhelmed.

    Reply
  13. The Lunds says

    December 27, 2011 at 6:34 pm

    I love reading your blog, Sarah. If it makes you feel better, my birthday is 12/21 and I never noticed any harried-ness on my mother's part growing up, just as I'm sure Patrick doesn't. My daughter just turned 3 on 12/3 and even that was a bit much for me – it all felt like toooo much. She, though, was happy as a clam. I think every child just feels special on their birthday, no matter when. Happy New Year!

    Reply
  14. Julie H says

    December 27, 2011 at 6:45 pm

    That looks like such a great birthday party for Patrick! Even if mommy was worn out ๐Ÿ˜‰

    My nephew's birthday is 12/21 and they try to have it the weekend before that most years. Now his parents are divorced so that makes it even more complicated on what day they can have a party. This year they had it on the 18th. Pizza, cake, presents with a few friends from school/the neighborhood and our family. I'm pretty sure he had a ball.

    Reply
  15. Charlotte says

    December 27, 2011 at 7:07 pm

    My son just turned 5 on Christmas day and I was absolutely exhausted by the end of the night! I'm glad to know I wasn't the only one.

    (My son didn't understand the difference between bday and Christmas until this past… I think it finally clicked.)

    Reply
  16. Kendra says

    December 27, 2011 at 7:30 pm

    Our daughter was due Christmas Day and arrived on Christmas Eve; she turned 5 this year and I have tried every year to keep things completely separate. We have had a birthday party each year for her earlier in the month and then we have normally spent her actual birthday with just the three of us. I make sure all her presents are not wrapped together and kept completely separate. It gets a little confusing, but I try not to make it too much (at least for now!) I don't know how we will handle it as she gets older, but for now it has worked really well for us.

    Reply
  17. Samantha says

    December 27, 2011 at 9:59 pm

    THese pictures almost made me cry because my little blonde haired boy will be 3 in 2 months…

    Reply
  18. Mangham Team says

    December 27, 2011 at 11:20 pm

    I see from all the comments there are several December birthday's. I am a December birthday and over the years I have heard so many suggestions like half birthday's etc. There is one that stood out to me…a girlfriends mom hosted her birthday every year before Christmas and she always included the special time of year that they were celebrating and the loot/goodie bags included a christmas ornament. I love that idea. I am after Christmas but before New Years so I just wanted birthday paper. I never had friend birthday parties just family (we had six cousins every year for christmas so that was enough for my parents). I have great memories of my celebrations.

    Reply
  19. Magnolia Verandah says

    December 27, 2011 at 11:58 pm

    One of my grand daughters was born on 27th December and is 4 this year! I remember it very vividly as my son went back and forwards to the hospital as there were a couple of false alarms on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day! We make a very special fuss of her so that her birthday does not get washed into Christmas Celebrations. Love the birthday games look like he had a wonderful time with family.
    Happy New Year I am very happy I found your blog.

    Reply
  20. Unknown says

    December 28, 2011 at 12:17 am

    My own birthday is on the 23RD and I have to admit I've always hated it. It just felt that with the Christmas business I've never actually enjoyed either as a child or now. One year I tried to change it to June 23rd and no one was availablwe either.

    Reply
  21. Amanda says

    December 28, 2011 at 2:52 am

    My boys are 12/22 and 12/6!!! Campbell just turned 10 and Christian 4! Looks like he and Patrick were just a few weeks apart ๐Ÿ™‚ We still struggle to squeeze it all in and keep Christmas seperate from birthdays! Hope your Holidays are blessed!

    Reply
  22. Krystina says

    December 28, 2011 at 5:22 am

    I had a hard time with my birthday until I was 8 or 9 I think. I was born on the 30th and I remember (or I was told this story enough times I feel I remember) that I was convinced Santa came for me on my birthday. I was also convinced that New Years parties were for me. That was mostly because my family would get together on New Years Eve to celebrate and a family member would bring a birthday cake to celebrate my birthday. It was until I was 8 or 9 I understood the difference. It didn't help that my two best friends (who are twins) were born on the 21st and had similar beliefs about Santa and their birthday. I think it's just part of the territory of being a "Christmas/New Years baby"

    Reply
  23. Cathy says

    December 28, 2011 at 5:46 am

    My daughter just turned 7 on Christmas Eve, and so far she loves it. We live far from family, but usually visit on holidays, so she often gets a little family party at Thanksgiving with one half of the family and a celebration on Christmas Eve morning with the other half of the family. I keep it very low key and just the family that we are with. Cake, simple games, a few presents. I wait to have a friend party when I have recovered from the holidays. Sometime in Jan. or Feb. She thinks that she is special she is born at the same time as Jesus:)

    Reply
  24. Erin says

    December 28, 2011 at 7:38 am

    I can't believe your baby is 4 Sarah!! What a little doll he is. CUTEST face. Really. And I'm quite sure you're right. Christmas about does me in every year so I can only imagine doing a birthday too. You are amazing! And so is Patrick. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  25. tammy g says

    December 28, 2011 at 3:47 pm

    My son's birthday is the 11th of Dec and I've never celebrated it in his month besides a simple cake with family. Usually we celebrate it in October during Halloween weekend so the kids can come dressed in costumes. My neighbor laughs at me every year that my son will grow up confused but it works for us. I can devote all my time to his party in Oct, have family over on his real birthday, and celebrate all that comes with Christmas without losing my mind.

    Reply
  26. Karin says

    December 28, 2011 at 10:54 pm

    Wow, after reading your blog and the other comments, I'm not the only one exhausted with Christmas/Birthday. My son was 3 on Dec. 26. I tried to do a full Christmas with family (24th my family, 25th my husbands family) and then a birthday party on the 26th. That is three full days of cooking and presents. I'm exhausted. There has got to be a better plan. Maybe the half birthday is the answer.

    Reply
  27. thebradshawfam says

    December 29, 2011 at 4:21 am

    Our oldest has a Christmas day birthday (12/25)! He was 5 weeks early so we really didn't plan it (I remember a very intense conversation with my husband on the way to the hospital – my water had already broken at 8:30 am 12/25 – and I was saying something like 'there's no way he will be born tomorrow, is there?') We've kind of rolled with it and we do a birthday/Christmas croissant in the morning with HBD song and a candle and then he decorates his birthday cake that night at my mom and dad's and opens birthday presents. It's been fun so far! We'll see how it goes when we get older! Also, thank you so much for your "gift list". I think the Plasma Car was the family's favorite – we had to kick the older kids off of it so the younger kids could enjoy! And we've had a lot of fun with MagnaTiles!!

    Reply
  28. leaderofthepack says

    December 29, 2011 at 2:14 pm

    I JUST had a baby on the 20th, so I'm loving keeping up with your birthday ideas for your sweet Patrick!

    Reply
  29. Ange says

    December 30, 2011 at 6:05 am

    We have a birthday to celebrate too! Our son arrived on the 21st, 11 days behind my schedule ๐Ÿ™‚
    We have a friend party the second weekend of the month and then a family elaboration on us birthday. He loves having a birthday in December because he shares his birthday month with Jesus! It's so sweet!

    Reply
  30. vera says

    January 4, 2012 at 4:30 am

    That is the coolest birthday party ever! I am so behind on blog reading. Happy (late) birthday to sweet Patrick, cannot believe he is four years old!

    Reply
  31. Gina says

    January 5, 2012 at 2:50 am

    What a cutie. Our kids are birthday twins! My daughter turned 4 on the 20th as well. It makes for a very EXCITING week!

    Reply
  32. Jenna says

    January 6, 2012 at 11:10 pm

    Oh he's such a cutie! I have 2 girls born in December…the 19th and 21st. I am also pretty worn out by Christmas. But it's all worth it and it makes the holidays that much more special!

    Reply

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When our first baby was placed in my arms I knew there was no place I wanted to be other than home with him every day. Twenty five years, and five more babies later, (six children, now ages 26-8), I still feel the same. I blog here about motherhood, how to make a house a home, easy recipes, and simple living. You can read more about me here.

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Nothing pretty, flashy, or spectacular. Just an o Nothing pretty, flashy, or spectacular.  Just an ordinary Monday morning breakfast counter after the kids leave for school.  Because ordinary gets the short hand in our culture but really it's extra special. 
It's a symbol of unselfishness, contentment, prudence and gratitude.  There is a certain peace about the ordinary.  It's the opposite of temporary-it holds the joy of contentment and gratitude and prudence all in one hand.  It's lends itself toward peace, and a settling in, not a constant search for more or less or anything.  Ordinary is authentic and good enough- in short it's a gem in disguise. ๐Ÿƒ
I love my home and I hope you do also. With all t I love my home and I hope you do also.  With all the imperfections and maintenance it requires, when I pull up and walk in I want to stay, to relax, to feel safe, for daily life to be easy, and to care for "home". I want simplicity, ease, convenience.  To me when my home is simple, without being filled to the brim of things that just take up space I love it best.  I hope if you've participated fully or even partially as time allowed in 40 Bags in 40 Days you've found that joy and pride in your home.  I plan to share more little challenges and tips as the year proceeds to trouble shoot areas and keep maintenance effortless and the house love flowing.  Daily life in our homes should bring us joy and ease while we care for our families, we should be thoughtful stewards of our money and of our time and simple living is the answer to that. 
Thank you for participating! ๐Ÿก
I think this is one of the best things about the 4 I think this is one of the best things about the 40 Bag decluttering process.  When I know what I have and have removed all that I don't, it cultivates more discretion and caution about what I bring back in.  I think there is also some realization of how much money is wasted on fads, or thoughtless purchases.  It's quite eye-opening.  I've become so much more careful, and find we all take better care of things, as do my children.
The final week of 40 Bags in 40 Days! I've tackle The final week of 40 Bags in 40 Days!  I've tackled all the areas of my home with exception of my oldest daughter's room (not the photo)- which she is excited to work on this week.
The simpler the room, the easier it is to clean an The simpler the room, the easier it is to clean and straighten up.  And then the more enjoyable it is to actually sit in that room.  It's not a hard equation, all it takes is ruthless purging-and not just little things but larger items also.  Functional furniture is the key and very few decorative pieces especially when children are in the home, makes life so much easier. 
๐Ÿƒ
As we head into the last week of the 40 Bags in 40 As we head into the last week of the 40 Bags in 40 Days Challenge I'm hearing from so many of you what a difference it has made in your appreciation of your homes, a certain contentment, and at the same time a thrill of looking in on the organized kitchen, closet and living space.  I agree!  I love purging, cleaning and organizing a space and then going back later that day just to get that wonderful sense of accomplishment.  It makes such a difference! 
๐Ÿƒ
A lighter, fresher, calmer home is the result of de-cluttering.  I even had a participant who had been planning on listing her home, start 40 Days just to get her house ready to sell, and then was so ruthless in the process and also thrilled by the results that they decided to stay put in what seemed like a new home to them.  What a savings of time, money and energy. 
๐Ÿƒ
Next week I will be talking maintenance and answer all questions! โ˜€๏ธ
Tips For Shared Kids Rooms- This bedroom has seen Tips For Shared Kids Rooms-
This bedroom has seen every configuration possible.  With kids spread out 18 years apart, I've had to be creative over the years-which I think is the key to sharing rooms.  It is all possible-I consider it a rare luxury and privilege to not have to share a room although I know that is not the norm today. 
๐Ÿƒ
I like to create a simple look with white furniture (this ends up making room transitions easier also when moving someone out and someone else in.) I also like to match bedspreads for a cohesive look. 
๐Ÿƒ
Clip on bed lights save space. 
๐Ÿƒ
A simple shared book shelf can hold a child's special books and knick knacks and if necessary can be assigned per shelf.
๐Ÿƒ
When my kids were younger I had my dad build me a large wooden roll out box for under each bed.  This held each child's toys. 
๐Ÿƒ
All clothes are kept in a closet instead of dressers to save space.
I feel like I bailed on everyone following 40 Bags I feel like I bailed on everyone following 40 Bags progress and tips.  My excuse is the stomach flu ravaging us all here in the last week with me being the last to fall and the slowest to recover.  On top of that the weekend before I tried to roller blade (don't even ask how many steps I made it) and majorly bit it.  Thankfully I think I just sprained my arm. So I've been using one arm for nursing sick children back to health, and doing whatever cleaning and cooking and straightening I can do.  Alas, last week was a wash.  We have two weeks to go.  I'd like to continue and end on a high note.  How about you?  Even a little de-cluttering counts! Spring is in the air and I can't wait to throw open my windows and let fresh clean air circulate through my fresh clean orderly home. โ˜€๏ธ๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒฑ
Especially where kids are concerned- we tend to th Especially where kids are concerned- we tend to think that the more things they have the happier and more occupied and loved they will feel.  Nothing can replace human interaction and I've found that too many toys has the reverse affect.  They cause overwhelm-just like us - we'd rather sit in an orderly space than one filled with too many things to do and too much stuff.
โ˜€๏ธ
When it comes to kids closets here are some tips-
1. Hand me downs don't all have to be received.  Or received at all.  Be choosy and keep just what they will use and need.
2. When children are presented with too many choices, tension and acrimony can exist.  Being able to open a closet with a reasonable amount of outfits can create more peace.
3. Cultivating independence in care of clothes is easier when there is less and the space is simplified and organized. 
โ˜€๏ธ
More tips coming on the blog this week.  I am moving my blog platform so I can't make any promises - it's under construction and that's exciting!
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