This week I am grateful for:
Life. A beautiful mother I had met a few times in our town passed away this week from cancer. She was exactly my age, 42. She lived in a beautiful house, had a loving husband and a seven year old daughter, a loving family, and many, many friends. 42 is too young. No child should ever be left without a mother.
This week I had quite a few times when I felt overwhelmed by my mothering duties. I worried after a college planning meeting, I felt inadequate after I grew frustrated in the after school frenzy/carpool/dinner prep, I felt deep sadness after I dropped off Patrick for his first little preschool day. Am I doing enough, being the mother I want to be? Can I embrace change in a healthy way, or will I always live with the sadness of letting my children go little by little? Do I have what it takes to make good decisions, and help my children make them also?
And then I am reminded that this-whatever this holds- is life. Every day is precious whether it is spent with tissues, with preoccupation, with frustration, with sadness. I get to experience it all-I get to figure it out, day by day, hour by hour. I get to see my children grow away from me, I get to do 100 things at once while someone calls “Mom, mom, mom” over and over again and my brain feels jumbled. I get to make endless lists, I get to drive carpool, I get to work through hard days.
What would so many trade for just one more day whether it was hard or easy, happy or sad?
So this is what I am grateful for this week: every day I get to spend on earth.
Life is precious.