My Thoughts on Breastfeeding
Here’s some tips I’ve learned after nursing six babies:
1. I read so much before I had Isaac. (Dr. Sears’ book on breastfeeding). I loved knowing what to expect (somewhat)…I was glad I had the knowledge and basics already, and didn’t have to rely on other’s opinions. (Not that others don’t have great advice, but some of it was wrong and I’m glad I knew the basics.)
2. Boys are hungry. I fed my boys every two hours and that two hours begins at the start of nursing! This slowed down as they got older for sure but I tell mothers of boys to be prepared for a lot of feeding time.
3. I learned how to nurse in bed, laying on my side. God Almighty, I’d be dead of sleep deprivation if I didn’t do this. I thank a sweet nurse at the hospital with my first baby who taught me the importance of learning that little trick.
4. Remember it only gets easier! So many moms stop at 4 or 5 months and once they start solids at 6 or 7 months, the feedings really ease up and become so predictable.
5. I keep a schedule of nursings in the very early months. Not so I can keep the baby on a strict schedule, but so I felt some order and predictability to my life. Those are two words that I thrive on, and if I find myself not keeping track it feels like I’m a fish swimming upstream. Just by writing down what time I started nursing, I knew what to anticipate and could predict a little rhythm to my days.
6. On frustrating days, I reminded myself of the benefits. I remember googlin ‘100 reasons to breastfeed’, to get a little boost of encouragement! I know it was really hard for me sometimes when I felt fat, and frumpy and I was the one who had to leave book club early.
7. Lactation consultant are awesome. I learned that almost every problem in surmountable…sore nipples, low milk supply, latching on issues. There are SO many people who will be willing to help now!
8. Pacifiers are a nursing mother’s best friend. Yes, in the beginning I was careful to not use a pacifier in place of nursing when they are hungry or you will mess with your milk supply, but once we would get going, it helped me not become a human-pacifier. (But I had two babies who didn’t take them and I survived.)
9. Growth spurts are real and lead to massive feeding frenzies. I swear one day I nursed one of my little boys it seemed like ALL day. Crazy. This is how they regulate your milk supply and when they are growing so fast their needs change.
10. Finding a good nursing bra was key. Especially if you are like me and get Pamela boobs and don’t appreciate the added weight, pain and cleavage. I have used the Leading Lady brand that I found on-line, and keep some Target cheapies for night-time.
Thanks so much for this post. I am getting ready to birth our fourth and already having breastfeeding anxiety. Those first six weeks…ugh…it's always so hard. But, I feel the same way, it is right for me and our babies…and pumping is from the devil…seriously, always stresses me out.
Great post. I am also a huge believer in supplementing once in awhile, especially when you have several kids.
i always hear that "if you're doing it right, it isn't supposed to hurt" but that is a load of baloney. i'm waiting on the big day when number 3 will arrive, and i'm a tad nervous just remembering how the first few weeks can be.
even so, i am a major advocate for breastfeeding. it is a wonderful and beautiful thing. and i think you made some excellent points 🙂
i think one of the main thing a mom needs to do before her baby is born is to decide how important breastfeeding is to her. if she decides it is something that she wants to do, then she should stick to her guns, find support (from her spouse, and from groups like la leche league) to help her stick with her decision.
i credit the support i got from everyone around me, as well as my desire to stick strictly to breast, to my success with breastfeeding my first 2 (and most especially my first, since i had the most difficult time with him for the first while.)
OH my goodness!!! You've stole the words from my mouth! I too had the same pumping issues and also considered formula, poison! 🙁 I felt like I would be a terrible mother if I gave my daughter formula… and at 4 months I tried it just to see how she did and she was just fine! My husband's a youth pastor so leaving during church to go nurse the first 4 months was so hard on my husband. Me being there was such a support to him… when I began to supplement it was perfect for the Wednesday night and Sunday morning feedings… My daughter was still a VERY happy baby and I continued to nurse for every other feeding. My only issue was that it really depleted my supply in the end… I wasn't doing it that often but my daughter began to be really uninterested in nursing so that was probably the case also. I was trying to stretch her out to a year but at 10 months she just weaned herself… she absolutely did not want to nurse anymore… she bit and pinched anytime I put it in front of her. So I let go and now she's solely on formula. I still wonder if there's anything I could have done differently to prolong the nursing but I'm trying not to beat myself up about it… I plan on having 3 more kids so I'm sure I'll figure it out with the next child! 🙂 Thank you for this post, it was encouraging to know I'm not the only one who has struggled like this! 🙂
yes, so true. breastfeeding your baby for as long as possible has so many benefits. i breastfed my eldest child (a boy) for a whole year, every two hours it seemed like. the first time he slept through the night was so odd, i woke him up to nurse him! ha! 🙂
our second child (a girl), i breastfed for two and a half years. because i heard that breastmilk is best for babies up to two years, and she's our last kid so .. weaning her (and me) took so long hehe. actually, when we decided to wean, it only took 3 days :). i was the one not ready, i think.
that last few pounds of pregnancy weight doesn't come off without help, and breastfeeding doesn't take it off.
great blog! *cheers*
I have really enjoyed your blog, but have never commented. I just wanted to comment about breast feeding- Me? I had a fairly easy time with it.(wonders never cease) My youngest is now 20, but both my children were good nursers, and I had plenty of milk. My secret? no worries, just relax, don't stress, and right at first don't worry about any kind of schedule. I truly feel that if you aren't stressed, neither will your baby be. Whenever I was uptight, or stressed out about anything, I struggled with nursing, But when I treasured those "special moments with my little marvel from heaven" I was able to relax, and enjoy. (sorry, this sounds kinda dumb, but it worked for me.)Another hint, rub your nipples with a rough washcloth every day,a month or so before you deliver. it will help "toughen up" the nipple, and there won't be as much pain.
I appreciate your advice on breastfeeding and agree 100%, but just wanted to remind everyone that not all women can breastfeed. Some of us simply can't produce the milk for whatever reasons. I'm a total advocate of breastfeeding, but feel it's important to remember that it's a privilege–not necessarily always a choice. 🙂
Great tips! I'm definitely not the Earth Mother type, more the briefcase & stilettos gal. Loathed being pregnant, giving birth & all that jazz. However BFing all my sons was the best thing I've ever done. I think there's too much intellectualizing though about the whole issue. Just relax, disregard most of the advice others will want to give you, follow your own instincts & that of your baby's. Keep your sense of humour all at times. You're baby will give you cues as when to wean, there are no set rules, just your own. My last baby was so late to wean I worried that I'd be going on his honeymoon with him!
Millie ^_^
I agree that breastfeeding is great, but agree with the other commenter that not all women can breast feed. I have 2 boys, I tried to breast feed my oldest and had so much problems. I just wasn't producing enough milk. I followed the doctors directions went to support groups and it just wasn't there. Finally, the pediatrician said I needed to go to formula b/c the baby was not gaining weight. It's not for everyone and that's OK too. The baby thrived after the switch
Something that helped me was to find support. There is usually a La Leche League group nearby to help. Ours meets twice per month. I've been going for 3.5 years and have found incredible support as well as having made lifelong friends.
Great post, Sarah! My worst part of bf is getting my milk in. I dread it. I always get waaay too much and they are like huge rocks and it takes a few days for them to settle down. My favorite is the sweet sounds they make when they are eating…
Great post! As a breastfeeding mom and Lactation Consultant I heard truth ringing through your words. I never gave my boys formula and I breastfed them for over a year each. BUT, I have moms that I work with that supplement and breastfeed. All that to say, invest in a Lactation Consultant to help you find the plan that works for you. She'll be your educator, trouble shooter, cheerleader and best friend those first few months. 🙂 Thanks again for the great post about a subject near and dear to my heart!
God's blessings,
Sarah Hinson RN, IBCLC
A Mother's Gift
Your Breastfeeding Resource, For The Gift That Benefits A Lifetime
I breastfed my first for 19 months and my 2nd for 12 months and never used formula. I have seen friends go through the torment of wanting to bf but not being able to and having to use formula for me to know better than to think it is evil, but I was able to bf so I did. I feel fortunate.
I weaned my son at 12 months when he bit me and I got mastitis and 2 days later when it was healed, he bit me again and put a hole in my nipple.
I had plenty of rough patches with it but am so glad I did.
Great, encouraging, and real post about this topic.
Emily@remodelingthislife
i could care less how any mother decides to feed her children. at least she's able to feed them.
i've nursed my firt 2 exclusively for a year and then weaned them both at about 18 months. i didn't try pumping until my 2nd child and only pumped in the begining because i had so much milk. i could nurse my son and still be able to pump 10 ounces on the side he nursed from. it's incredible how much milk i produce. after the new baby comes i might even donate my milk… still looking into what the means and if it's worth it to not have a stash at the house for the off chance we'd get a sitter.
Great advice and tips! I too breastfed all 4 of mine and it wasn't easy at the start, but like many have said, I was determined because I truly believed nursing was the best for my baby. Once the first couple weeks were through, it was a breeze. My first 3 did take formula or pumped milk a couple times a week so I had a little freedom, but #4 refused the bottle whole heartedly. We finally decided spending over 1 hr. for him to get about 6oz down was ridiculous, so I nursed him exclusively for 14 months. Kind of a pain at the time, but being my last, I am so glad I had that time with him for so long.
Breastfeeding is the natural way to go, obviously, but it isn't always as easy and wonderful as some make it out to be. New moms need to research and decide what works best for them and go with it. And those that decide to nurse, MUST find support and help early on – even though it is how God designed it, He didn't make it easy.
I'm one of the readers who begged you for this post 😉 THANK YOU! My first is due in July and I'm looking forward to all of it – especially breastfeeding – even though I know better than to expect sheer bliss. Thanks again Sarah – enjoy your day!
Well…you know my thoughts on this! Still going strong over here. Nursed all 4 of my kids..not one of them ever took a bottle. I tried to pump but it was way too much of a hassle for me…what's a year out of my life right? And I'd be a walking zombie if I didn't lie down and nurse…my favorite is breastfeeding right after the baby is born…
I loved nursing my babies and feel so sad when they are completely weaned. My last one–little number 10, came very early and after 5 weeks of pumping with little results and he still hadn't latched on, the lactation lady even said some kids just don't do it. I was devastated. I had to go through an emotional breakdown-this little gift I got so late in life wouldn't have that bond with me that his nine older siblings had, I felt I had let him down. After I got over that trauma, we developed a good bottle relationship. I made sure I was the only one who fed him, this was for me more than for him. It helped me to have him associate only me with his food. I loved nursing and other than the first few weeks, it is one of my favorite things about having babies.
Ah, I wish I'd seen this post before I had my last baby – my first boy! – because you are exactly right – they are HUNGRY! I feel like all I did – literally – for the first six months of his life was nurse him. Oh, and the weight stuff – I'm SO happy to hear that not everyone drops their weight. I can't lose the rest of my weight at all! Thanks for your honest post, it sure does cover everything a nursing mom needs to know!
Here's a problem for you – how do I wean my almost 15 month old? Carter never would take a bottle after he was a couple of months old, so it's always been all me. And now, he doesn't like milk – he actually gags when I give it to him. I envisioned this easy transition from breast to whole milk, but he wants NO PART of it. I don't want to break his little heart, but Mama needs to stop nursing sometime soon! Any advice???
love this post! I wish I had read it before my first breastfeeding experience. No one told me I'd be in toe-curling pain for the first 6-8 weeks while the baby latched on. Or that my baby had no idea what she was doing for the first week – sucked on her tongue instead of latching. Aren't babies supposed to instinctively know what to do? Mine didn't, that's for sure. I kept at it and all was well eventually, and I finally weaned her at 15 months (though she would have kept on nursing much longer I think). I wish someone would write a book on the 'real deal about breastfeeding' – that it is not always easy and doesn't always come naturally to baby or mom, etc – maybe you should! 🙂
Totally agree with you on many points above!! The first few weeks of nursing are really difficult – I did the washcloth thing too and would quietly scream at first latch that first week – it was torturous with ALL 3 of my kids. One lanolin cream really did help but made a mess of my bras – the washable or disposable pads really helped with that and the cream did work. I supplemented all 3 of my kids with formula very early on (earlier than 3 months). I did pump with my first 2 because I worked, but we also used formula. One of the things I would recommend strongly is to keep track and nurse on time even if it means waking your baby during the day – it will make your night MUCH better. I did this for #2 and #3 and they slept longer at night after 4 months. I think it helped to stay on top of their hunger during the day and they could stretch a little further at night between feedings. All of my kids slept with me the first 4 months so I could nurse easily around the clock but #2 and #3 easily switched to a bassinette/crib after that.
ENJOY the time when nursing – if you resent it, you'll be so frustrated. I used that time to read a book, to take a breather. My other kids would entertain themselves, watch a short dvd, etc – no guilt there. I read SO many books when I nursed my kids!!
This post is the best – you should print it in pamphlet form. Thank you so much. I am 10 mos into nursing our 3rd, and was just complaing to my husband this morning about those last 10 lbs – I'll just chill for a few more months. Love your blog.
This is a great post and I am so a breastfeeding advocate. I have 5 children and have BF 3 out of 5. My 4th was "tongue tied" and couldn't latch. By the time we figured it out she was too used to teh bottle and wouldn't latch. My 5th is 6 weeks old today and has been in the NICU for all of that time. We started out breastfeeding and he was doing great, but due to some other issues he has completely stopped latching on. It has been hard for me because I wanted to BF him so badly especially because I didn't get to BF #4. However…he is growing and developing and doing well. I think BF is a great thing, but sometimes it just doesn't happen. There is some judgement out there on both sides and it so doesn't need to be there. Moms do what is best for their babies!
Venita, I'm right there with you! My lovely little girl came 6 weeks early and I couldn't nurse her from the start. Right around her due date, my supply started to tank from just pumping and I tried everything to get it back up, but it didn't work. I absolutely loved nursing her and all the health benefits it gave us both, but when her head circumference followed her weight in falling off the growth chart, her pediatrician and I decided to throw in the towel. We made it over 4 months, but I had really wanted to nurse to about 18 months.
You are soooo right! I couldn't have said it better myself. I don't supplement b/c my babies won't take a bottle…and like you said, it's only a year. Right? I would do it if it would work though…
So true….I am grateful for the Lactation Consultants that helped me in the hospital. I hope that I can hope my kids someday. Our parents were supportive, but did not have the experience to help with specifics.
I feel it is one of the best things I did for my kids, besides reading to them. And when I breastfed, that's what I did with the siblings – read.
I also supplemented which gave me some freedom to get out of the house without a panic attack. I admit, by the 4th, I barely supplemented because I was so comfortable with breastfeeding by that point that it was simply easier!
I endured the early pain, mastitis, and even managed to have thrush nipples. My only regret is not having a doctor be able to recognize this. The pediatrician said the baby might have thrush, my ob/gyn said I did not have it, but the pain continued. Finally, my internist took a sample and properly diagnosed me. That's when I wished I had a family doctor that treated all of us!
All of it – completely worth it!
I gave it the ole college try with my first one. I lasted about 8 weeks. At 6 weeks, I had gone back to work, and just couldn't do it. Besides, he was never satisfied and end up on rice bottles soon after.
My second was so close to my first and he was so sick all the time, that after a week, I gave up in tears.
My third, I did for about 4 weeks.
Lucky for me, everyone turned out healthy and fine, and we all bonded well. MHO is that if you can and like it, DO IT! If not, don't feel guilt, just love your life and your babies.
Great post!
Those are great tips! I'm so glad I nursed my kiddos!
Fantastic post. I had a ton of similarities to you, especially the pumping fiascos. It just seems that some people have a harder time getting anything when they pump, eh?
It's amazing how each baby for me nursed differently. I needed help with the fourth, even though I had done it for an average of a year each with three other babies. One tip that I wish I had know with the first that the lactation consultant gave me with Lucy was this: Imagine you are picking up a glass of water and pay attention to what your head does when you go to drink it. It was eye-opening to realize that my head tipped back. She taught me to hold the back of the neck instead of the back of the head, giving the baby freedom to tip her head back as well, making swallowing easier. (It is really harder to swallow with your head forward.) Even if this little tip helps one mom, I'd be so happy. Because it REALLY helped me!
Thanks Sarah! I SO needed to hear this right now. I loved breast feeding with my first two but am struggling with my third. My milk supply is so low (probably because of my after birth complications and time in the hospital) so I am having to suppliment a lot. Plus you are right about boys – Kole eats SO MUCH more often than my girls did! I'm feeling a bit frustrated with nursing and was thinking about forgetting it all together until I just read your post. Now I think I'll keep truckin' along and try to make it work. 🙂 You also made me feel better about the weight that isn't going away as quickly as I'd like. I'll stop blaming the candy I'm eating and blame it on nursing instead. 😉
Hi, I follow your blog and read it all the time but I don't think I have ever commented before!
Great post. I am struggling with my 8th month of breastfeeding my son and almost every day I have to give myself a big pep talk to keep going. Today you were the one who gave it to me! :o) Thanks for the great post!
Great post, I am a first time Mom to my 9 month old son and have breastfed since day one. I do not supplement cause I have fears of that stuff like you stated. It has been ok since I stay home with him but I can see how having more than one child of different ages with multiple schedules would probably change my tune on that. I really just wanted to say the reason this post made me happy is because you said you lost weight AFTER breastfeeding and I have NEVER heard that before. I got so excited! I hope that is the case for me too! 🙂
Great post! you are bringing back lots of memories. I nursed all 7 for at least a year. Mastitis is the worst! Microwaving a wet wash cloth in a zip lock bag became worth more than gold.
You are so fantastic and so is this post. I love how you tell it like it is! I recently weaned my 16 month old and nursing him is one of the greatest accomplishments in my life. He has several food allergies. I was free of dairy, soy, wheat, egg, peanut, anything crappy and artificial to nurse him. The diet was easier b/c it had the most important purpose. He started refusing bottles at 4.5 months old. We finally got him to take my milk from a sippy cup so that I could go places. I had mastitis once and pray that I never get it again. All of the hard work was completely worth it. He loved nursing and I loved that time with him. I also feel that it is a lifelong gift.
Sarah, I laughed out loud at your kids drinking the milk you pumped and wanting you to buy more. Priceless! I nursed my first for 14 months and am now at month 13 with my second although I'd like to wean him in the next month or two so we can gear up for trying for number 3. I also completely agree with all of your points. Pumping enough milk has never been an issue for me; however, I despise pumping! I also lost all my extra weight after I completely finished nursing and hope that the same happens this time around. Great post.
OH…it is always so nice to read/hear something so close to my own heart. I have a love/hate relationship with breast feeding. With my first, I was all in, reading Sears through and through, bought my fancy pump (to use when I was working ans help bring the supply in), and was so excited to take part in something so natural. But it wasn't natural. It was hard. My first didn't take to me for a week and a half, but I continued to pump and tube feed her swearing off bottles and formula. I was so excited over every cc of milk I produced and she ate. She eventually "got it" and loved it. I never produced enough. I did everything Dr Sears suggested as well as took supplements and ate foods that were supposed to increase supply. I would get angry with women who never bothered with breastfeeding because they "didn't feel like it." I would cry over the smallest amount wasted. I eventually accepted it, supplemented with formula and I weened her at about 13-14 months. My second, born last August, came out of the womb nursing. Once my milk came in, she developed latch problems; talk about pain! I was a bloody mess. I wanted to give up so bad. I didn't think it seemed fair to her though. Luckily, I wasn't opposed to bottles and supplementing with formula this time, and I healed, and she takes to both wonderfully. She is nine months now and I am ready to near the end. You are so RIGHT. The last ten pounds does not leave until the nursing stops. I actually feel like my appetite grows the first month nursing and I could eat the city out of sugar. It is the hardest thing I have ever accomplished. Harder than pregnancy, harder than finishing school, harder than marriage. But I love it, and it was one of the things I looked forward to most when we found out we were pregnant with my last; and now I am ready to ween her (which I do so slowly it will be another two months!). I want more children, and as silly as it sounds, I feel like I have to reach my homeostasis before I can devote my body again. It was nice to read your post and identify.
Love this post! And I am one of those who cannot shed the last 10 lbs while nursing, my mom was too.
Love this post!
I gotta admit, I was a little offended when you said that you considered formula poison. I guess I just needed to read a little further, haha.
I had to go back to work when my daughter was just three months old. She had formula while I was at work for eight hours and then we breastfed (no pumping, I missed her all day at work and we needed to be close) when I came home. It was kind of the best of both worlds for us. We still got the bonding and health benefits, and I totally didn't have to warm up a bottle at 3AM.
P.S. Boys aren't the only hungry ones. My little girl wanted to nurse EVERY HOUR ON THE HOUR… and like you said, from start to start.
Never ever did it! Thank God! Raised two healthy daughters and I don't think I missed a thing!
Just wanted to add that there are definitely good reasons to breastfeed and everyone should try it. BUT–on the chance it doesn't work for you (my doctors told me that I made skim milk instead of cream and that I needed to go to formula) do NOT beat yourself up. Formula will not ruin your babies/children. Give yourself a break if you can't do it—-there is so much more that's important! That said—breastfeeding is awesome if you can!!
Thank you so much for the honesty in this post. I breastfed my first born and it was so hard. I had all this anxiety, i know it affected my let-down, when i finally got it down pat, i got mastitis. OMG – i thought i had marbles in there and the flu all at once. I wanted to die. I paint a pretty picture don't i? anyway – yes, it got better, but it was never great for me like everybody promised it would be. I know for some it is, and that's great, but for me, no. and by the time maternity leave was over – i had moved him over to formula (also carnation good start because he was lactose intolerant as well) and you know what? It was awesome!
i gave up quick all five times.
it wasn't for me.
i needed space….i would have gone insane.
it was selfish but i just couldn't do it.
i lasted 2 weeks at my shortest and 6 weeks at my longest.
i also think my boobs didn't work right. 🙂
because when i quit….cold turkey…never looked back….and never had any swelling or discomfort.
i think they were broken. ha!
I so agree with you. Breastfeeding is worth all the aggravation, soreness, the feeling of being tethered to your child 24/7. I recently weaned my 3rd (and last) child. She took right to nursing but I unfortunately had plugged milk ducts constantly as well as a killer case of thrush. I wouldn't wish the pain I went through on my worst enemy. I somehow managed to get through those rough early days and we made it through to her 16th month! I sometimes miss those days but I'm glad to get a measure of freedom back!
Great post. Some Mom's can't avoid certain medications and most of the time it is STILL more beneficial to nurse while on meds than not. Some great resources about nursing and medications/herbal treatments are kellymom.com, safefetus.com and any of the books by Dr. Thomas Hale. I ended up buying a used one of his medical guides because my Dr. couldn't even tell me if a prescription was safe or not. I still reference it:)
So glad to hear your take on formula. I'd love to be able to breastfeed my babies but we're adopting. Yes I know there's a possibility of lactating, but seriously- it's not worth the stress to me- and it would eliminate any possibility of getting pregnant if I went on prolactin hormones. I formerly thought of formula as poison, too, and am trying to come aroudn to it. It makes me crazy- I'm so careful abuot what I feed my husband and I and now I have so little control over what feeds my precious babies the first year of life!
OMG, agreed on every post! Except one…little girls can be hungry too! Mine was 9 pounds when she was born and most days, she was feeding off of me every 1 to 2 hours. I really don't remember the first 8 months of her life that well because I was a zombie from no sleep! But it was worth it. I nursed til she was 15 months old. My only suggestion to new moms is to set small goals. Tell yourself "I'm going to go to six weeks." Then when you hit that goal, up it to 9 weeks, 3 months, 4 months, etc until you feel that you and baby are ready to wean. I went through 4 bouts of mastitis with my munchkin and each time, I was more than happy to give birth naturally again if I could avoid the breast pain. But in the end, it was worth it all!
Thanks for the encouragement! I'm currently nursing our third who is a mere six days old. The pain is immense at times but I do treasure the bonding I can have with her. I nursed our first until he wouldn't stop biting me (ouch!) which amounted to nine months and our second for seven months because he was eating me alive. I was losing too much weight trying to keep him fed!
What a great post! I nursed my little man for a year, and he is 19 months now. Sometimes I really miss nursing.. And sometimes I'm SO glad it's over. I say this b/c he wanted to be nursing all night long, which was very uncomfortable sleeping on my side all night every night! I am so glad I did it though, and if I have another one I will definitely BF again. I went the natural route for his birth too, which was a veryyyy long 3 days of labor! I remember when I first got pregnant I thought that BFing was gross and I could never do it. Then I took a Bradley class and it all changed. lol. Good luck to those mommies out there who are expecting and going to give it a go! It really is best for baby =)
great post…
I breastfeed daughters until they were 18 & 21 months… in the end – it was only at night before putting them to bed. I hope when my girls have children they will consider breastfeeding.
My girls are 33 & 30 years old – and breast pumps at that time were "painful contraptions" from what I remember!?? I was a child-care provider (fancy name for a babysitter??) for 3-4 other children so I really never needed to try pumping.
My other memories:
* standing in the warm shower; back to the spray & letting the warm water cascade over my shoulders to give my "engorged breasts" some relief… I laughed at the comment about the kids drinking the breast milk in the bottle… I remember the girl's dad (we are divorced now) thinking I should try to catch the "squirting milk" that sprayed all over… what a joke that was… and definitely not worth the trouble.
* oldest daughter was a "snacker" & wanted to feed from both sides until nothing was left; she would breast feed for 45 minutes at a time so I felt like a milk machine. My other daughter was "racer" – she would suck for 5 minutes & "boom" that was it for a couple of hours; so I was always "lopsided" – you could tell which side she had fed on.
* the first time I got away from home (went to the market – book clubs, soccer games, PTA, scout meetings – weren't part of my world at that time); I was in the check-out line & a baby started crying somewhere in the market; my milk "let down" so I had two big wet circles on my t-shirt… pretty embarrassing!
* I have a funny memory of "engorged breasts" and squirting milk all over the babies face…
* rough washclothes & rolling my nipples between my fingers helped me prepare for those first days of breast feeding.
* I admit – I did "freak out" the time daughter #1 had tinges of blood in her spit-up (but my nipples were pretty tender still). I got in the habit of drinking a huge glass of water when I sat down to bf – my milk let down quickly; I was more relaxed concentrating on drinking without spilling water on the babies face; & I think all the fluids helped my milk production!
* I got in the habit of placing my arm against my breasts to keep the milk from letting down before we settled in for a feeding; I can still remember that tingly feeling right before the milk let down…
* breast feeding "forced" me to slow down & enjoy the moment!
* I also have fond memories of my oldest daughter cuddling up to me with a book so I could read to her while feeding the other daughter… sweet!
* bf was convenient & cost effective; I bf at the movies; at a wedding (discretely, of course & covered with a baby blanket); tent camping (first trips were at 4 months for each of them.
* I was fortunate that my body produced enough milk that I didn't have to supplement (& I worked at home); I was actually one of those gals who lost weight (but then, I was never really thin – so being at my pre-pregnancy weight was my goal).
Also, I gave them water if they were thirsty. Do a lot of the bf moms offer water – just wondering? My girls sucked their fingers so I didn't have to deal with pacifiers; introduced solids at 7 months (no cereal – started with vegies & fruits that I ground in a small baby food grinder)…
Thanks for the moment of nostalgia… if you can bf – do it!
Thank you for this! Especially the part about feeling tied down. I sometimes feel like that in the middle of the day when I am nursing my 14 month old to sleep and I want to be out walking or something. But I like how you said that you are supposed to sit and cuddle your baby. We ARE! Thank you for the simple reminder. They are only young for a short time. I really needed to hear this. Thank you!!!
Missed this post due to vacation….so glad I read it, even though I'll never get to nurse again. I am so happy that I was able to nurse my babies! I'm grateful that I had an older sister to set the example of breastfeeding and provide me with lots of support; I also had a wonderful OB who provided a breastfeeding consultant free of charge to all of his patients. My experiences with breastfeeding my four children varied widely: my first used me as the human pacifier–she LOVED to breastfeed; my second was the most efficient eater and never needed long nursing sessions; my third was soooo hard to breastfeed–probably because of her (at that time undiagnosed) heart condition, but I'm grateful I persevered and gave her that specially designed nutrition; my fourth couldn't feed orally due to her medical condition, but I was able to pump my milk for her for the first four months–continuous pumping was the hardest thing I've ever done as a mother, and my heart goes out to any mother who has to do that and really admire any mother who can pump long term. I'm convinced that each baby provides you with a completely different nursing experience.
Funny story….I was still nursing my first when I got pregnant with number two (number one was a year old). I'd been trying to wean even before I knew I was pregnant, but number one was resistant, and I didn't want to force the issue. You know how your breasts get incredibly sensitive during the first few weeks of pregnancy? Well, my nursing one year old decided to bite me one day–right after the positive pregnancy test–and I thought I would DIE it hurt so much! I decided our nursing days were over then and there, and quit cold turkey….only my milk didn't quit with us. I became so hugely engorged that the slightest movement was excruciating–definitely couldn't pick up or hold my wiggly one year old. I was miserable AND living overseas, far away from family or my trusted OB. Luckily, one of my sisters called a LaLeche consultant who suggested that I wear cold cabbage leaves in my bra for a few days. I now spell "relief" c-a-b-b-a-g-e!!! That cabbage did the trick. After that, I made sure I had a head of cabbage in the fridge every time I had a baby, to deal with the first few days of breasts engorged with milk. My husband and I still joke about starting a line of cabbage leaf lingerie….it sounds so crazy, but it works!
Thanks, this was a very encouraging post. I'm still nursing my 9 month old (my first), and it was rough going at first (syringe feeding colostrum, DDs, mastitis, soreness, bad latch), but I had so much support from my own mother and other mothers in my life. I powered through the relatively short time of difficulty, and now I love nursing, even the being "tied down" part. It helps me to take life at a slower pace and not constantly be running hither thither and yon. The best investment I made was a home visit from a great lactation consultant and two Medela bras. Worth every penny. I'll be so sad the day my baby weans.
I just wanted to leave a quick comment regarding medication. I have four kids and was only able to nurse the first, and I'm convinced it was because of anti-depressant medication that I was (and still am) taking. I tried to go off it so that my babies would nurse but my depression was so bad that I couldn't. It was the lesser of two evils to give my babies formula. I felt so guilty for so long but because of a chemical imbalance I just have to take my meds. Anyway, that's my story in a nutshell. You are right though, medication of any kind can really have a huge effect so you have to be very careful about anything you take.
Thanks for these question and answer posts, they are really fun and interesting!
This is for Heather L. You might try going to formula at first in place of whole milk. Gerber makes an older baby/toddler version. It will be more similar to BM. Once he's adjusted to that & weaned, you can start mixing in milk. Say 1/4 milk to 3/4 formula. After a few days to a wk of accepting that mix up it to 50/50. If that's too fast a transition you can back down to 1/3 milk in the mix & increase more gradually with 10% increases.
HTH
Thnx for echoing what most of us learn the hard way and unecessarily so.
Just want to add my 2 cents even though this is from a few months ago.
My first baby was 7 weeks premature, so I couldn't begin breastfeeding when he was born. He was given breastmilk via a tube when about 4 days old and then when the breast was introduced to him when he was 10 days old he took it after the first few tries. Here in India babies are never given bottles in the hospital. Instead, if for some reason the mother can't feed them, they are given milk on a spoon or with a small metal feeding cup made especially for that purpose. That way, when the breast is introduced, they won't refuse it.
I breastfed my first exclucively as he was with me all the time. With my second I learned that there are times when formula will save your sanity, such as when out in public and not being able to find a private place to feed.
I weaned both my babies at 11 months as I was pregnant again both times. I introduced them to yoghurt bottles at first, filling about 3/4 of the bottle with yoghurt and the rest with water to make it thin enough to drink. Once they were over a year I slowly introduce milk. My daughter took longer to accept milk as, while she loved it, she would get seriously constipated when drinking it, so I went slower with her and she didn't have any more problems after she was about 14 months or so. Both kids were very good solids eaters by a year, so I kept the bottles for night time when they needed them, then slowly weaned them off. My son was weaned at 16 months with no problem. My daughter is now 18 months and is still being weaned. She loves her food and I am having more trouble weaning her but I want to do it before baby #3 comes in a few weeks.
I found that I did loose most of my weight just from breastfeeding, but then a point would come when nothing more came off so then I would have to focus on exercise. That was the only solution for me.
Great post! I've breastfed my first two and will do the same for my 3rd (coming in July!). I completely agree with you that there is a misconception that breastfeeding 'shouldn't hurt'. I make it a point to tell the truth to my friends: it DOES hurt, at first. But once you get past the first few weeks, it is easy. If more woman were told the truth, they would probably stick with it longer, instead of throwing in the towel early. Thanks for an honest post!! You rock!
I have read your post and all the comments, and can't help but raise my hand and speak. My children are 23 and 21 years old. When they were born, my milk came in quite well…BUT, I chose not to breast feed…not because I couldn't, but because I wanted my husband to be able to experience that feeling of giving our babies love & nourishment while holding them in his arms (among many other reasons). I know a lot of mothers choose to breastfeed, and that's fine. But it really angers me to hear some refer to formula as "poison"! How dare they. I'm sure you don't refer to the milk you buy on your grocer's shelf as poison, or the solid food you give your children (that you probably bought off the grocery shelf) as poison. I know this is your blog and you can say whatever you choose, but I don't appreciate you making mothers who choose not to breastfeed out to be less than humane. As I said, my children are grown now, but they have led the most healthy lives of anyone I've seen. They never once had dark circles under their eyes like I've seen in some breastfed children.
I appreciate your willingness to help new mothers choosing to breast feed, but just remember they're new mothers out there choosing not to that don't need to feel like they're poisoning their children!
All great tips which I find to be very true as I am currently 9 month into breastfeeding my second child. Thank you. I love your posts, you are down to earth and reasonable. I like that!
I came across your blog somehow…..doing a search on something related to pregnancy. I've read through a few of your posts and they are refreshingly honest and insightful:) This one caught my attention b/c I had a horrible time nursing my first one. I'm now 14 weeks pregnant with my second and have not forgotten the anxiety, pain, and torment I put myself through to exclusively breastfeed at all costs. It paid off, but I did not enjoy my baby his first 4 months of life. I refused to supplement or give him a bottle for a long time because of the mentality you're describing. I was terrified he would start refusing me and I would fail him by not breastfeeding for at least 6 months. I made it to just shy of a year. However, this is my last baby and I am determined to enjoy every moment as much as I can from now on. If that means supplementing on occasion to give me some relief and sanity, sobeit. This is a sensitive topic of discussion, almost as sensitive as politics and religion, women get into such heated discussions over it. People need to calm down and just do what's right for them. There's no perfect way to parent. We are all fallible human beings whether we breastfeed for 1 week or 3 years.