It's hard for me to announce it for many reasons, and one is because I have a very very tender spot in my heart for those who are trying-to get pregnant, to hold onto a pregnancy, to adopt, to find peace with a path they never thought they'd have to walk one day. With my first three pregnancies, in my late 20's, I never gave a thought to these struggles-I was that oblivious girl who thought if you wanted a baby, you got one 9 months later. I cringe when I think of that young, carefree me, but a tiny part of me will always wish that I could get that "carefree" back in my vocabulary when it comes to pregnancy. After those three blessings, I learned quickly what it feels like to want something so badly that everyone else seems to be getting so easily, to feel like many don't "get it", to deal with the few comments or questions or actions that are hurtful or just plain rude. I also know that there are places that friends have traveled when it comes to fertility/pregnancy/babies that I can't even imagine...after all I have five healthy children, and am so so lucky and grateful that my sixth is on his/her way. An incredible blessing.
So thank you. We are all so happy and excited here. We didn't tell Andrew (my fourth and the one that has yet to build a fortified filter between his mouth and his thoughts sometimes) till just last week, on the premise that we (Andrew and I and Jeff) had talked and thought he was old enough to have this deep responsibility to keep a secret for all of 7 days-we made a big deal out of it. He blurted out, "Oh don't worry Mom and Dad. I have SO many secrets stored up in my brain, and I haven't said a word about them to anyone. I can keep this one up there too." Somehow, that wasn't the answer I was looking for but it made us all burst out laughing.
Posts
So exciting:)
ReplyDeleteI'm dealing with something kind of similar.
I am young and naive, I suppose. I generally don't care what people say but I am so sensitive and private when it comes to my pregnancies and births. I have been thinking this baby is a boy for 21 weeks and today we found out it is a girl (yay!). Now I'm having to deal with snide remarks about "that's why you shouldn't be so sure" and eye rolling about me just KNOWING it was a boy. It makes me regret sharing anything with anybody! How do you let those things roll off your back?
I have a feeling this is only a hormonal-induced problem! If I wasn't pregnant it'd be a breeze I'm sure:)
Exciting news! My baby is starting school this year and I am having a hard time with it. I have had a little one home with me for 12 years what am I going to do? I keep teasing my husband that it is time for number 4.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your new addition! I have one question though that i hope you can answer somewhere somehow. Do you ever egt confronted with those not so positive remarks from people on the street when they see or know about how many children you have and how do u deal with the comments. I have 3 myself and you wouldnt believe the comments i've heard from people, some even family from, will i be tying my tubes now to well thats it right, are you guys done, are they all yours,do u own a tv? its horrible and i never have the guts to be rude back bc i never know what to say until im driving home and come up with the most brilliant comebacks. i think big families are beautiful and yes i do want more, i recently got a bumper sticker that reads "if u think my hands r full u should see my heart" maybe i should get a tshirt with it and wear it , alot. thanks and wishing you a happy healthy pregnancy!!! what a lucky baby that will be your a great mom and a source of inspiration for me
ReplyDeleteSarah...I am so happy for you and your family. What a tremendous blessing! I'm so happy you shared this exciting news with all of us. You are an amazing woman and mother--this baby is so very blessed to be coming to your home and family. ;-)
ReplyDeleteMany blessings!
I am thrilled for you! What a beautiful blessing from above!
ReplyDeleteAugust 20th is a great day! ;) (My birthday!) Congratulations.
ReplyDeleteHaha! I love all his "stored secrets!" That is the cutest.
ReplyDeleteI had miscarriages before both of my boys were born and yes, it does make you realize how precious we ALL are. Life in general is so delicate yet so miraculous.
Happy you are healthy and growing :)
So funny about the grocery store man... and very cute that he didn't just ask. Smart man :)
ReplyDeleteYour empathy and compassion are touching. I believe it is allowing you to more fully rejoice in this gift. Nothing is more glorious than being involved in the creation of life. I am so very happy for you. And I've been thinking... maybe it was you (not me) in your dream, boarding down that ski hill at MOC speeds... pregnant. ;) love you.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts are the same as Iola. My youngest is the same age as Patrick, starting school this year and my oldest is about to turn 18. I love them all (4 of them) and would still like to have another (my husband too) but we do worry about what people may think of us and we do get the same comments as Iola. However, when I read your post the other day and the comments after, it made me so happy because I realised that there are so many people out there who believe that big families are wonderful that I shouldn't be worrying about other people.
ReplyDeleteSo glad to read this news and hope all goes well.congratulations.
Wow Sarah - congratulations! I am so very pleased for you... we had our first in August last year and I am loving being a Mama and take so much inspiration from your blog... thank you for being so honest and real. I have been totally loving the "40 bags" thing this year and I'm so impressed you've been doing it in the midst of early pregnancy!
ReplyDeleteMuch love from England, and may God richly bless you and your family as you bring this little one into the world (Psalm 139)
Claire x
clarinascontemplations@blogspot.com
Wow Sarah - congratulations! I am so very pleased for you... we had our first in August last year and I am loving being a Mama and take so much inspiration from your blog... thank you for being so honest and real. I have been totally loving the "40 bags" thing this year and I'm so impressed you've been doing it in the midst of early pregnancy!
ReplyDeleteMuch love from England, and may God richly bless you and your family as you bring this little one into the world (Psalm 139)
Claire x
clarinascontemplations@blogspot.com
Congratulations,what wonderful news.I have just found I am pregnant with our 7th and am looking forward to reading your posts about large families and new babies:) Thank you for you blog I really enjoy reading it and once again congratulations on such wonderful news.
ReplyDeleteOh and I must say I really agree with Lola too,if I had a dollar for every time I was asked if we didn't have a tv or people trying to be funny by saying that we must not know how they are made or we would stop I would be rich but I love our large family and their negativity is theirs.I am going to try and think up some witty comebacks this pregnancy so I have them on hand!
ReplyDeleteThank you for being mindful of your announcement to those who struggle with infertility and pregnancy loss.
ReplyDeleteIt really is difficult to conceptualize how NOT easy it is to get pregnant. In high school, they basically scare you into abstinence by telling you how easy it is to get pregnant. Then, when you actually want to, there is this fear that it won't happen, or if it happens easily, that it won't stick. When I was 10 weeks, a "friend" found out that I was expecting by accident (don't ask how). I was petrified that she would tell people and if something, God forbid, happened, I'd have to tell people I didn't even know, knew. It is such a sensitive issue. Can't wait for more updates on Clover Lane Kid, #6.
ReplyDeleteThis was so beautifully said.
ReplyDeleteI had 2 babies...boom-boom.
No problem.
I took it for granted.
I was in my 20's.
Babies just come to those who seek, right?
Or...many times to those who are not even seeking.
But then.
The door closed for years on pregnancy.
People often said...you have 2 healthy children. Isn't that enough?
Well, yes.
And no.
The heart can't stop asking for what the heart desires so.
Finally, after 8 long years of monthly torment. I had a third.
It was so absolutely wonderful.
That I told my doctor in the midst of my c-section.
I'm soooo ready to do this again!!
But, another 6 years went by without a new baby to hold and love.
And one heart wrenching pregnancy that ended with a ruptured fallopian tube and surgery.
And I remember sitting in the waiting room of my OB, and another mother with a few little's in tow, came out with a sono picture.
Her partner was doing his best to comfort her.
But, she was clearly upset about the unwanted little intruder.
And me...
I wanted to scream at her.
I was just there to check and make sure that all previous pregnancy hormones had finally left my body after the loss of that wee little one.
And I cried to the Doctor that day.
I was almost 40.
Time is not on my side.
How could that woman care so little and I care so much?
And with all of the things medicine can do...like end pregnancies for those who choose.
Why couldn't it save mine or those for the rest of us, who desire to have a much loved and wanted pregnancy?
Finally, though.
Got another little busy-bodied, beautiful boy.
Be still my heart.
And what I love about this, your confirmation. Is that...
I'm 41.
Almost 42.
And I may just get this chance again.
And I love that your heart is very, very tender.
And my goodness.
If that photo up above is how you currently look....
You look amazing!!
And I am so excited that you will be sharing your journey with us!
XO
You know Sarah...that is just what I love about you. You are so aware of how others feel and are concerned about how your news may affect them. You can see it through your baby announcement post and your I don't know how she does it post. I do have to say I got a bit teary eyed reading your big news...happy for you but so sad as I'm just dying to have a fifth baby but it's not a good choice for us financially. I so appreciate your concern for others and am so happy for your family. That new little baby is going to be SO blessed. Best wishes!
ReplyDeleteI was a teacher before I had kids and I wanted to wait until after the first trimester to tell anyone at school "just in case" because first pregnancies, I had heard, you just never know. A really good friend and fellow teacher was pregnant and I didn't want to "steal her thunder" at all either. I was happy just to know myself and share that with family. Then that teacher that was a friend had a miscarriage and I just could not tell anyone at work. Finally around my 5th or 6th month when I really started to show and couldn't hide it with baggy clothes and we'd made the decision to figure it out on one income...FINALLY that teacher looked at me one day and said, "Are you?" and I burst into tears and grabbed her to hug her. She hung on to me for awhile and I had to tell her that I was due just a couple weeks after she would have been due. It was so awkward for me in a way because I felt so bad for her. She was very generous and gave me a lot of the things she had bought for her baby. We are still friends today, she now has two healthy children.
ReplyDeleteThank you for acknowledging the struggle that many are going through related to having a child. While I am truly happy for you, it's hard to read other pregnancy success stories when we've been struggling to conceive. I deeply appreciate your acknowledgment of this private struggle.
ReplyDeleteSarah, that was so beautifully said. Thank you for that. SO MANY people take pregnancy, babies, and children for granted. Even though we got our miracle baby (due in May) while saving up for IVF, the scars of fertility issues do not heal. Every appointment is scary, waiting for the doppler or ultrasound to show that baby is still ok in there, and every "oops, we're pregnant!" or "we got pregnant on the first try!" is still like a slap in the face.
ReplyDeleteThank you for helping people be aware of the pain of infertility and pregnancy loss, and most of all, congratulations! I've loved your blog for a long time, and am really looking forward to reading it when we have children close in age. =)
Thanks for your sharing and sensitivity. Thinking back to my pregnancy. My sweet sister and I were pregnant at the same time and so excited to be sharing this experience. She miscarried a couple of months before my daughter was born. So hard! Her reaction when they wheeled me out of the operating room and the nurse held my daughter up for all to see blessed and broke my heart all at the same time. She put her love for me way above her own pain. She was so thrilled for me and has loved my baby all these years. I know there was a big whole in her heart that day but she found room for us. I had many friends tell me that our relationship would be forever scarred and we wouldn't be close. Idiots! Anyway, she has not been able to conceive again.
ReplyDeleteWe had 2 boys and tried to get pregnant a 3rd time and it didnt happen. Then when the youngest was 7, I got pregnant unexpectedly. I was shocked but happy. At the ultrasound I found out it was twins. I couldnt stop crying. I was 39 at the time and no family around to help. It was overwhelming. I felt guilty for my emotions because I knew others who would love to be pregnant with twins. Of course, it all worked out and they are now 7 and a delight. I cant imagine our family without them.
ReplyDeleteOh, that was so sweet.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.loganmakesamess.com
Hooray! Congratulations on a very sweet blessing!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations! This is exciting, especially since you're due exactly a week before I'm due! I love reading your blog, even though I rarely comment (sorry!), and feel like I'm your kindred spirit even though we've never met. :)
ReplyDeleteSomehow I missed this announcement! Oh, congratulations to you and your family!! I am so very exited for you all:-).
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the topics that got me hooked to your blog- I read your posts about having gaps between children and the pain of trying for them. My first two were like your first three...and after a miscarriage and now many months of trying, it is a whole new ball game. And yet its taught me sensitivity and how to be more considerate of others. And also to rejoice with each new annoucement, even if it can't be mine. :) So congratulations again!
ReplyDeleteLoss/waiting is oftentimes a very lonely journey so thank you for your sweet words, so beautifully put. :)
ReplyDeleteGotta love your sweet Andrew's comment and your belly shot...so precious. Can't wait for this little one to get here!
You are so compassionate....congratulations!! I am thrilled for all of you!
ReplyDelete~Julia
So happy for you!
ReplyDeleteSarah, I enjoy your blog so much because you are real and you have a wonderful perspective on life. Thank you so much for your sensitive words. I read your announcement with mixed feelings for the very issues you mentioned. It really touched my heart just to read your acknowledgement of the pain and loss others feel. I'm so excited for you and your family, and thanks again.
ReplyDeleteHa, ha, that's so funny about Andrew's secrets.
ReplyDeleteCONGRATULATIONS to you and your family for your newest blessing on the way.
I'm no longer having any of my own; I'm awaiting grand-babies at this point, but I do have a friend that can't have children. Instead of all the time she has wasted feeling sorry for her situation she could have adopted, foster care, etc. I know this may seem harsh, but life deals us different situations and what makes us is how we learn to deal with these situations. Regardless of hard times I want laugh lines on my face, not frown lines.
So again, CONGRATULATIONS to you.
Congratulations! Hope it all goes well.
ReplyDeleteCongrats again! What a blessing.
ReplyDeleteWe have a two year old, almost three, time files. We decided to start out with international adoption. Now that I've been to a Russian orphanage I may never be able to have biological children. Not because of fertility issues, but matters of the heart. Just so many wonderfuls already waiting.
www.tylickadventures.blogspot.com
Am I the only one wondering if there's a secret to how you get that hair band to hold your jeans together? Clever & chic. Think I'll go test it out now.... xx
ReplyDeleteSarah, I'm so happy for you! Congratulations.
ReplyDelete(Just getting caught up reading on Google Reader and this was the first post. It kinda ruined the surprise, but nonetheless I am so happy. Babies are wonderful!)
sarah,
ReplyDeletecongratulations! my sister told me today that i must come read your blog....i'm expecting too and have been so out it 'la la land' with fatigue and havn't been able to catch up on my fave blogs :) so so happy and you are so right. each and every life is such a blessing.
cheers!
sara
Once, a woman at church 'hid' her pregnancy almost the entire nine months. She came late and sat in front, leaning forward in her seat. She wore flowing clothes and left early and never spoke to anyone.
ReplyDeleteWhen she arrived with a baby in arm, one friend of hers was so put out she observed, "I will just say, 'Adopted baby?'"
Really, she had refused to share any of the joy with even her long time friends at church. It was hard to know what to say to her.
So glad you are happy to have the new baby coming!
Just wanted to wish you well on your latest adventure. I am the same age as you and I honestly can't imagine going through pregnancy again now. I love reading your blog and I look forward to seeing how you adapt to fit in another beautiful baby! x
ReplyDeleteok...so I'm a bit envious of that baby bump.
ReplyDelete:)
CONGRATS! I am so thrilled for you! I think having your children so spread out it so fun. My baby brother is18 years younger than me. Although I was mortified at my high school graduation. But since I've grown up I love it. ;).
ReplyDeleteAndrew is adorable. ;) And how sweet you are to be thinking of others during this. I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy and couldn't get pregnant for two years after that. The last year was with the help of a fertility clinic and finally I got pregnant with my son on my very last cycle of Clomid. We are Catholic and were not going to be moving on to invitro so we were really unsure of whether we would be blessed with children or not. It seemed that EVERYONE around us was happily pregnant or having babies and it was really heartbreaking. I would have been so touched by a friend who thought about that at all in the midst of her own joy.
ReplyDelete~Tamie
congratulations!
ReplyDeleteMy first 3 came to me easily, but my 4th, due just a couple weeks after yours, was a different story. The desire has been there for what felt like forever. It's funny how I expected I'd just get pregnant when I thought I should, and when it didn't happen over and over and over, I was very discouraged. I know I didn't suffer through the pain that many women suffer through, but I feel like the wait for this baby helped me to understand that pain, even just a tiny bit. I know what it's like to hear baby announcement after baby announcement and wonder "why not me?" And so it made me feel cautious and guarded about revealing this pregnancy to the public, very much like what you wrote in this post.
All that was really to say, this was a beautiful post, thank you.
Oh wow...I so missed that post! Congratulations!! You have always been so thoughtful of others, and are handling this no differently. Such an exciting time ahead for you.
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness Sarah - CONGRATULATIONS!! I am so happy for you and that little one on the way. He or she is coming into a great family. I have goosebumps right now, anytime I hear someone announce a pregnancy, I get goosebumps. So excited for you!
ReplyDeleteWishing you a safe, healthy and happy pregnancy.
ReplyDeleteI am so jealous I can't stand it!! Good for you! My biggest regret is that my three are all in college and I didn't have at least two more. You're awesome!
ReplyDeleteAmen and amen. I had my first two no problem and was in complete "naive land." Now that I am 35 and have had 8 pregnancies but only 3 kiddos to show for it, my whole outlook has changed. I am grateful for my boys, 11, 9 and 2. I have really been enjoying your blog lately. I have come back to it three times this week to just read randomly. I would love to "follow" it, but I don't see any way to do that? Am I missing something???
ReplyDeleteSarah,
ReplyDeleteCongratulations. You are such a wonderful mom. I could not be more thrilled for you and your family.
Best.
Congratulations! I am due with #2 and both were complete surprises--we were told we'd never have children! Now, we have a 3 year old little boy and an angel girl due in 12 weeks:) Best wishes for a healthy and happy pregnancy and an addition to your already lovely family!
ReplyDeleteWow I'm so excited for you! I hope Abby gets a little sister :)
ReplyDeleteSo BEAUTIFUL that you are so open to life - God Bless you! And please do tell us sometime what kind of car you drive!! so I have ideas incase baby #5 comes along for us! :)
ReplyDeleteFirstly, congratulations! I love your blog and reading about your gorgeous family - wonderful that you will be welcoming another love. I can't wait to read if that beautiful scan photo is a girl or boy. Thank you for acknowledging parents whose path to parenthood is difficult/not quite what they thought it would be. I'm one of those mummas. Thought I'd have a brood by my early 30s, but found myself late 30s and single so decided to go it alone as to not miss out on being a mumma. My divine daughter was born when I was 40 and I can't imagine my life being happier. Thank you for sharing your lovely family with us.
ReplyDeleteawwww congratulations! I'm pregnant with number 5 and loving it. I hid it the last term of school and then came back in the new year to find out that everyone knew! And I mean everyone! I didn't have to tell too many because word had spread:)
ReplyDeleteI hope you have an easy pregnancy and I'm sure it will fly by! I'm due July and it's coming up fast
Corrie:)
Wow!!!! I have been away from blog reading for a long time as we are in the process of going through a major move but I was so happy to see that #6 is on it's way!!! I have four kids and would so love to adopt one more (we adopted #4). But I am 43, and my husband will think I am nuts because life is crazy with 4. Thanks for giving me the inspiration to at least entertain the idea (even if it's only in my head). Take Care!
ReplyDelete